Don't know how to flirt...

[Caldus]

Thanks DopeStar.

 

I am going to go to the pool again today. When the opportunity comes, I will approach her and say something like:

 

Me: "Hey, I'm . What's yours?"

Her: .

Me: "Hey , nice to meet you."

Her: You too.

Me: Blah blah (some more small talk like say maybe it's a real nice day, etc.)

Her: Blah blah

Me: I know I probably shouldn't ask this, but I would really like to get to know you more. Can I have your phone #?

Her:

 

Do you guys think this is good? I'm ready (and probably expecting) to be rejected, but I guess this is the only way I can better at this.

 

Thanks for being patient with this hopeless romantic, LOL.

[bzborow1]

Here's my take. Just go up and start talking to her, after a little small talk say, "I never got your name".....As for the other part.

 

 

 

Me: I know I probably shouldn't ask this, but I would really like to get to know you more. Can I have your phone #?

 

That's a defeatist attitude. Why do you feel you have to apologize for doing something that's completely natural? Just tell her, "hey you got an e-mail//phone number..." You don't have to half hide the fact you want her, in fact it's better if you're honest about it. DO NOT APOLOGIZE for wanting to get her number......

[Caldus]

I guess you're right.

 

I think she goes to the same college as me because of the sticker on her car (I think that's her car). So maybe I could come up to her first and just ask what school she goes to. I was thinking of coming up to her and saying:

 

Me: "Hey, got a question for you. Do you attend ?"

 

If Yes:

Me: Awesome! I go there too, blah blah...

 

If No:

Me:

 

And then at the end I would just say:

 

Me: "Didn't catch your name..."

Her:

Me: I'm . Nice to meet you.

Me: "Could I have your phone number?"

 

Is that better?

[DopeStar]

Your second approach is going to work much better. I like how you picked up the word "Awsome". I like this word because of what it means, it has a sense of amazement about it. Its a very enthusiastic word which is much better then something like "cool" which actually is a term for something not so hot, see what I mean. I try to use words that bring about that sense of amazement and excitment, happy words that radiate with good things. Like BzBorow said lose the defeastist attitude, you will shine with confidence when you do. A lot of that is how you say things too but if you use the right words you can blur that line a bit.

[bzborow1]

I would also just like to mention that the fact you are thinking up how the conversation is going to go is a great sign. If you're shy the best thing you can do is to actually sit down and think about how YOU'd like the conversation to go...at least initially....that way you'll likely know how to handle the situation much more smoothly. And after a while you have to mentally rehearse it anymore because it will become natural to you. Like learning how to swing a bat of something...

[Caldus]

OK...here's what happened:

 

I came to the pool. When I saw the perfect opportunity, I gathered some courage and just walked up to her. I managed to get her phone number, but she didn't seem to be too interested. Not sure though, I think she was just not trying to look too interested since she was working there and all. So I gave her my number too and told her that I would call her sometime. She said OK. I'm thinking about waiting until maybe Saturday or Sunday to call her. I don't want to seem too eager about it.

 

And so now my next dilemma is what should I suggest we do? I'm just so bad at this, LOL.

 

But at least I won't be depressed tonight knowing that I got accepted or rejected (and not neither). I feel like there's hope again with this whole situation.

 

Thanks a lot guys. Not sure what I would do without this site!

[Derek]

I was thinking, and this is probably bad advice, but whatever,

imagine if the next day you walk up to her and give her a sly smile

and say,

 

"Hi there, so the other day I got this cute girls' phone number, but now I am trying to figure out how soon I should call her or what. Like, I was all nervous because I don't wanna mess it up. I trust you, so do you think most girls would think I was too eager if I called her in one day or should I wait for three days before I called her?

"

And she says blah blah...

"So if I called up this girl and she was nice and remembered who I was and stuff, should I just decide what place to go to or do you think I should ask her for what she'd like first?"

 

She says, blah blah...

 

And you go,

"So do you think this girl would be allergic to mini-putt golf? She seems quite athletic, she lifeguards and stuff y'know?"

 

 

and so on... =)

 

 

BTW, it's bad advice, but I would think it would be funny.

 

 

[bzborow1]

It's not so much how LONG you wait, just how frequently you call and what you say. I would wait 1 or 2 days and call her. When she answer's the ONLY thing you do is:

 

"hey! I'm just on my way out and I thought i'd give you a ring..."

"lets go for some coffee and stimulating conversation..."

 

then set a date for the coffee...then say something like this...i used it and women seem to like it,

 

"you may make an interesting friend."

 

edit: Caldus, never read into what she's telling you in that stuff, only worry about the actions...she gave you her number.