"Just be youself" and pushup/padded bras

[doorik]

Um quick question,

 

Am I supposed to take advice from girls who tell me to "just be yourself" even though these same girls wear pushup/padded bras on a regular basis?

 

Isn't this hypocritical?

 

Any thoughts?

[BreArna]

I would probably say so .. Because by saying ' be yourself' it means on the inside, ur emotians , the way you treat ppl etc.. Wearing a pushup bra is usually jus to help fill out clothes alittle better, and also with some people for extra confidence. So in my opinion they are different

[DestructoBoy]

Classic bro.....

 

Women do so many things to make them selves to be what they're not.

i.e. push up bras, chunky shoes that make them taller than they really are; Highlighted/colored hair, make-up and jewelry. Please.....this is solely for their self-image. (and god bless all of them! Young, old, skinny, fat) I adore them all!

 

Seriously dude...do you, as a man, really pay attention to jewelry or highlighted hair? Of course you don't......

 

However, push-up bras will make any hetero man look twice.

 

Now, to actually ask if you should take advice from a woman because she wears a push-up bra? Doesn't make since my man. She's still a woman and has very valuable insights on matters we as men can't fathom.

 

If she's your friend take her advice. If she's a stranger you should be wise enough to be very wary of ANYONE"S advice.

 

Just because she wants to be a woman doesn't make her a bearer of ill advice my friend. Love and respect ALL women....they're the reason you exist.

 

Take the advice, but as always, take it with a grain of salt. Trust your gut.

[SweetGemini]

very well said destructoboy!!

 

"Love and respect ALL women....they're the reason you exist".

[lil_unique_me]

well said there. i really think that us women can give you men an insight into the female mind cos lets face it you cant fathom us out but we can preety much fathom you out cant we. or can we??? let me know what you think that that point.

Catie xx

[Ash]

First, I have to comment on what DestructoBoy said:

 

Seriously dude...do you, as a man, really pay attention to jewelry or highlighted hair? Of course you don't......

 

Um, yeah. I do!! These things do speak of a lady's character, personality and often social status.

 

But everything else you say I agree with.

 

There's another way to look at the initial question, being yourself means doing what you want versus what somebody else wants. If you do or don't want to wear a padded bra, just make it your choice. So definitely take their advice and be yourself. And then decide how to dress, act and look. It's your choice!

[just_smile]

hey

 

id have to disagree,

 

i dont think they are being hypocritial, because, this think about highlight and jewlery and stuff, these are what makes a person themselves and it is what gives them confidence to be who they are, without becoming someone else. As you said they wear it on a regular basis, so isnt that technically part of who they are?

 

~LJ =;

[lil_unique_me]

i have to say that i like your thinking. i have my hair streaked blonde and i like it that way cos it gives me some confidence- even though i can act like a ditz at times but i dont wear jewellery other than a watch but thats just me and its just what i do. so u go girl and i agree with you 100%

Catie xxx

[DestructoBoy]

I never said anything about anyone being hypocritical.

 

It's not what's on the outside that matters.......

 

I just tried to point out that "some", if not most guys, overlook certain things: streaks, necklaces, rings, and finger nail polish. I can find out about a woman's personality and character simply by speaking with her.

 

How can someone assume to know a womans personality and/or character by what jewelry or hair style they wear?

 

I agree with being yourself and if you want to dress or make yourself look however you want, more power to you. And that goes for what makes you feel confident, whatever works for you.

[Ash]

In all honesty? It's really quite amazing what you can pick up from things like earrings, hair styles, rings etc. from a quick glance. I don't know, perhaps it's something that men have to learn. A lifetime of observing and matching up the external things like that with the internal things you get by talking.

 

But it does come down to the same thing as the initial poster was querying. If people are themselves, and wear what they want, it really will reflect their personality.

[SweetGemini]

Hey Ash,

 

What do you think of this?

 

When I am at home i can be quite scruffy, no makeup, very casual, comfortable clothes, hair tied up!

 

But when i step out of my house, i must wear well matched clothing, right accessories, hair all done up, nice subtle make up, I look all feminine and very high maintenance!

 

So who is the real me?? Either when I look scruffy or high maintenance I am still the same person on the inside but reflect differently on the outside... You know how many people out there are sooo shallow!!

 

I went to a video store the other day right after a gym session, and the guys there did not look twice at me!! I thought to myself, is there something wrong with me because when i usually go, they all usually stare at me!! hmm it just goes to show how much looks makes a difference to how people perceive you... but u dont know a person by the way they dress, they accessorise and the way they do their hair, the only thing you can know by this, is that they take pride in their appearance, that is all! To know a person you have to overlook the way they look and talk to them, give them a chance, get to know them... Looks can be deceiving!!

 

Amen

[doorik]

Some very interesting posts. Although the replies from th eladies were pretty easy to predict

 

I would probably say so .. Because by saying ' be yourself' it means on the inside, ur emotians , the way you treat ppl etc.. Wearing a pushup bra is usually jus to help fill out clothes alittle better, and also with some people for extra confidence. So in my opinion they are different

 

"Filling out the close a little better" for what purpose? to look better right?

to attract the attention of guys right?

Is't this being what we want you to be rather than being yourself because honestly these garments are pretty deceitful.

 

"extra confidence" why? because you will look better through artificial enhancements?

 

Please advise

[doorik]

hey

 

id have to disagree,

 

i dont think they are being hypocritial, because, this think about highlight and jewlery and stuff, these are what makes a person themselves and it is what gives them confidence to be who they are, without becoming someone else. As you said they wear it on a regular basis, so isnt that technically part of who they are?

 

~LJ =;

 

So lets say I don't have a car so I have to take the bus everywhere. However, lets say my older brother goes to europe for several months. Let us also say that I drive his Acura around "on a regular bases" during this period long enough for the females to think the car is mine. The question is is it really mine or am I using it to attract their attention under false pretences?

 

Please advise

[BreArna]

Girls dont always wear a certain type of clothing just to impress a guy, you can wear something to give yourself confidence, its not all about impressing the opposite sex.. And cant someone wear something to make them feel good to themselves or whatever the case just because they want that feeling but not because they want a guys attention.

Do you honestly believe that girls only get dressed up to attract a guy ?

[BreArna]

Thats just lying.. Because if you let them believe that then thats wrong of you.. But really its just a car, who cares!

Its about personal choice, you can wear what makes you feel good and comfortable, so if a girl wants to wear a pushup bra that whats it got to do with anyone else.. if it gives a guy a false idea of what size she really is and then he finds out oneday the truth then his reaction will just show whether he is shallow or a decent guy

[Ash]

SweetGemini, you asked me what I thought about something. Part of what you said was:

When I am at home i can be quite scruffy, no makeup, very casual, comfortable clothes, hair tied up!

 

But when i step out of my house, i must wear well matched clothing, right accessories, hair all done up, nice subtle make up, I look all feminine and very high maintenance!

 

So who is the real me?? Either when I look scruffy or high maintenance I am still the same person on the inside but reflect differently on the outside... You know how many people out there are sooo shallow!!

 

Well, aren't both of those ways of being natural for you? If you dress to impress somebody else, and it's really not what you'd like to wear, you're doing it just because somebody says you should, then you're not being yourself.

 

I likely didn't explain myself too well though. And you called me out on it, that's fine.

 

I look at it like this. I dress certain ways on certain occasions. That's because I am comfortable with dressing that way when I'm in those particular situations. When I work around the house, and in the garage, I am of course going to wear appropriate clothes. When I go out for dinner, I feel far more comfortable if I dress well. A lot of the rest of the time, I dress casually.

 

In other words, clothing varies by circumstance. Nobody tells me what to wear in those situations, I wear what I feel comfortable in.

[just_smile]

hey

 

So lets say I don't have a car so I have to take the bus everywhere. However, lets say my older brother goes to europe for several months. Let us also say that I drive his Acura around "on a regular bases" during this period long enough for the females to think the car is mine. The question is is it really mine or am I using it to attract their attention under false pretences?

 

ash

the car isnt your and thereforeeee you arent being who you say you are, you are lying, when a girl wears a padded bra, then it is usually hers since we all have different sizes, and thereforeeee she is being who she is and not someone else like she sister lets say, also as BreArna we wear clothes to feel good and confident about who we and to enhance how we feel about ourselves and they are not to just impress men!! that is where men and women differ, women do things for them self and men do things to attract the attension of women.

 

maybe if you could come up with a different senario then i could see where you are coming from.

 

~LJ =;

[doorik]

hey

 

 

 

ash

the car isnt your and thereforeeee you arent being who you say you are, you are lying, when a girl wears a padded bra, then it is usually hers since we all have different sizes,

 

~LJ =;

 

Being deceitful about your body is not lying?

This type of garment is made to draw the attention of males just like low rise jeans.

 

"we wear clothes to feel good and confident about who we and to enhance how we feel about ourselves and they are not to just impress men"

 

So a deceitful act is justified if it makes the individual confident about themselves huh? In that case the car scenario is a justifiable one if it makes the guy "confident about who he is"

 

"they are not to just impress men!! that is where men and women differ, women do things for them self and men do things to attract the attension of women"

 

Right everything women do is for themselves and never to attract the attention of men

 

need more input for most posts are unconvincing.

[doorik]

hey

 

 

 

ash

the car isnt your and thereforeeee you arent being who you say you are, you are lying, when a girl wears a padded bra, then it is usually hers since we all have different sizes,

 

~LJ =;

 

Being deceitful about your body is not lying?

This type of garment is made to draw the attention of males just like low rise jeans.

 

"we wear clothes to feel good and confident about who we and to enhance how we feel about ourselves and they are not to just impress men"

 

So a deceitful act is justified if it makes the individual confident about themselves huh? In that case the car scenario is a justifiable one if it makes the guy "confident about who he is"

 

"they are not to just impress men!! that is where men and women differ, women do things for them self and men do things to attract the attension of women"

 

Right everything women do is for themselves and never to attract the attention of men

 

need more input for most posts are unconvincing.

[Ash]

Umm, just to make a quick point - I didn't write the stuff about the car ... Somebody else did!

 

But another thing comes to mind, padded bras, pushup bras whatever, a lot of what we wear is generally tailored to accentuate certain features and diminish others. Whether we really elect to or not, we sometimes 'lie' about our bodies. The bras may be a bit more extreme, but actually drawing a line as to what is natural and what isn't, is difficult.

[ck]

Yes it is how are you going to tell somebody to be real with themselves when your trying to hide the fact you got small breast?

[ck]

Wait wait I just want to know one thing?

 

How can you tell Doorik that driving his brothers car is wrong, yet in the same sentence say a push up bra is not deciving because it is hers?

 

I mean yeah shen piad for the bra but she is not born with those boobies. Sorry to inform you, but 2 wrongs don't make a right.

 

Deceving is Deceving,

[doorik]

@ck

Her point is that deceitful acts are justifiable if it makes the deceiver "confident about himself/herself". So, following that Logic, the car scenario (which is just an example) is not a decitful act and is justifiable if the it makes the person confident about himself. Thus, Lying is ok depending upon the situation

 

I love logic.

[ck]

Hey that car is confidence too, so there should be no problem right?

 

I mean if I payed to barrow my bro's car and you paid to have bigger boobies it's the same exact thing my view.

[just_smile]

@ ck and others

 

So lets say I don't have a car so I have to take the bus everywhere. However, lets say my older brother goes to europe for several months. Let us also say that I drive his Acura around "on a regular bases" during this period long enough for the females to think the car is mine. The question is is it really mine or am I using it to attract their attention under false pretences?

 

this was what was said, there was no mention of paying for the car, even tho it was an example.

 

I mean yeah shen piad for the bra but she is not born with those boobies. Sorry to inform you, but 2 wrongs don't make a right.

 

hahaha, very funny even though there are two breast it doesnt mean two wrongs, its still one. the woman who wears the padded / push up bra is not lying about who she is, she would tell the man / women that they are not real or at least they would find out when you know.. she would just be using them for confidence, whereas with the man he is lying, unless he tell her / him / them, but this is very unlikely becuase the people he meets wont have time to ask because theyll be flying past in their cars, unless he sits in his car all day!!

 

Yes it is how are you going to tell somebody to be real with themselves when your trying to hide the fact you got small breast?

 

she wouldnt be trying to hide the fact that she has smaller breast! she is just giving herself the confidence to be the person she is!! besides what is wrong with smaller breasts? people are too materialistic these days ,

 

so if your saying that then is the guys trying to cover up his small penis then if he drive a cool car?

 

~LJ =;