Have I broke the NO CONTACT rule

[SLBG]

Hi

 

Well I have been doing the NO CONTACT now for 3 weeks.

 

I was sorting out some emails 2day and accidently sent a blank email to my ex. (Dont ask how, you couldnt of done it if you tried) lol

 

Well she receives this blank email and replies. Nothing special. Just a quick hi how are you email.

 

So I didnt reply, she asked a few questions in the email about how my family was, if business had picked up etc.

 

Im not sure, but I think she must be curious about what I have been doing ?

 

Should I reply telling her how I am getting on or just leave it at that. Maybe even a lil email sayin hi im ok u ???

 

Could do with some advice

[sbrew21]

I honestly don't think you should write her back. I think by not answering her it will probably make her want to call you, because she will be curious! If you do contact her she will know that you will always be available when its convenient for her and this is definitely a no no.

[kuhl282000]

The no contact rule the way I see it. Can be a double edge sword. It cuts one way and it can end up through contact cutting your heart wide open again. I will say that from the nature of her response she is talking in very general terms. And that tells me she wants to keep things light, at least for now....no pressure of any kind. Depending on the break up circumstanses, if the breakup was civil.

I don't see any harm because contact was already made by accident to respond with something very light and general.....like I'm doing fine, the family is fine, hope your doing well.

 

 

think of you often

hugs

 

your name

 

good luck

 

kuhl

8) 8) 8)

[SLBG]

Well I didnt reply to her email.

 

I just got another email from her, she finishes work now so I wont hear from her till moday. She wrote the following:

 

Im off now so i will email you on Monday for a proper chat!

 

Hope you have a good weekend! Im off to get drunk 2nite.

 

 

(her name) x

 

Well reading this email really upset me, I no its kinda strange. She wasnt nasty, at least she sent me a email.

 

I just carnt help but think that I have lost her forever. I no its stupid as I lost her 6 weeks ago when she walked out but I always kept hope.

 

NOw Im back 2 square 1 again, Im feeling so low and wish I hadnt spoke to her.

 

If she missed me and wanted to chat y wont she contact me over the weekend.

 

Its been 3 weeks of NO CONTACT, she didnt even send me a txt or n e thing. Then I send her a blank email and she replies.

 

I dont think she cares about me n e more, its just so hard to see y somebody would hurt you so bad. Im not a bad person, I have my faults. I never stopped loving her, just couldnt see how much she meant to me until it was too late.

 

Why do I put myself up for being hurt, why do I want her so much.

 

Im so confused, just wish she would tell me she still loved me.

[SLBG]

Well I am feeling really desparate people.

 

I really want to see her, I have missed her so much and hope she has missed me.

 

Do you think I should txt her over the weekend and ask If she wants to meet up for a coffee or something?

 

Should I wait till Monday, talk via email and see if she wants to meet up one evening for a drink?

 

Im missing her like crazy and she did the dumping, do you think she will also feel nervous/excited as we spoke via email today?

 

I no they are strange qustions, my heart is racing, I feel so strange. I just want to see her, tell her I love her and hold her in my arms.

 

Im not gonna do anything crazy, like drive down to the pubs shes in or send her 100 txts.

 

Just looking for some advice.

 

I read on this site that you should do what ever makes you happy, speaking to her makes me happy but I no I cannot handle just being friends.

[RJ]

I wouldn't contact her, in my opinion.

 

She dumped you, let her sweat it. You want her to feel that you've moved on with your life and things are going well.

 

When she contacts you on Monday be aloof and vauge, "I'm doing good, family is good, etc... Hey I got this blah blah blah going on so can't chat. Maybe well talk sometime."

 

Then wait for her to call... email/texts are so impersonable.

 

Good luck... because I know how all this sucks.

[SLBG]

Thanks RJ,

 

I was pretty low earlier, full of emotion when she emailed but stayed strong and didn't respond.

 

Don't think she will be sweating it, she hasn't had time to miss me.

 

I don't want to lie to her and tell her I have moved on if I haven't. I can see your point though.

 

I don't know if I will speak with her Monday, I feel so hurt and abused. Kinda thought I was ready for just friends but looking at things I don't think I am.

 

If she does email, I will be vauge, wont say to much.

 

Had some strange feelings 2nite. Was thinking of asking her to go away with me this summer for a holiday. Crazy I no.

 

Thanks for your post.

 

 

slbg

[neallo82288]

Here's the deal. You are feeling low and full of emotions because you have had contact and you would have liked to have more meaningful contact with her. you desperately want to hear her voice and etc, but you need to move on man and see that yes she is gone (atleast for now). The fact of the matter is that you two are broken up and you have yet to move on and still wanting her is doing more damage to your self-esteem.

 

Take some time to yourself and work on your faults, because we as humans all have faults. Heal yourself and work on yourself. Do the things that you were doing before, that she found so attractive. Just do things to get her off of your mind and heal. Take some time and work out, go to a club (comedy really does wonders), read some books, do anything but contact her. Let her come back to you if that is what you really want.

 

This is going to be harsh but. Do you really want a person that threw you out like a common piece of garbage? She threw you away and Yes I realize that you love her, but you were not good enough for her in the past and what has changed to make things better for you?

 

So to be rough on you, but that is a fact and you must know it.

 

Neallo

[SLBG]

Hi neallo82288,

 

Thanks for your post.

 

well I think your right, I messed up big time. I feel like a piece of garbage. I loved her and she doesnt love me.

 

I will move on with my life but its gonna be tough.

 

Still feeling low

 

slbg