This is really confusing.....

[Timmer]

I had dated a woman for the last five years. The kind of woman that comes along once in a lifetime! But she recently broken up with me about 2 weeks prior to Christmas. Ultimately it was because a friend of mine of about 10 years decided it was time to tell her a few things I had said about her. Needless to say I was not much of a person for saying these things (too controlling, over zealous, and thought of leaving her) but I was hoping for some insight. She had takin all of her stuff back except this futon. I don't know how much she cares about me anymore but I know she cares about this piece of furniture. But since she has no place to put it it remains in my possession. Now the thing is that we haven't seen each other except twice since this happened and she thinks that I should give her money for it since she has nowhere to put it and no way to get it from me. She also expects a little more money for things she bought me when we were together around 500 bux, the couch was a little over a hundred. I still have the deepest of feelings for her and would walk the Sahara on my hands backwards to have another chance with her. So in short, What should I do about this money situation and how should I deal with this so called "friend" who ratted me out? Couse I would really like to pound him flat! Although it will not do any good. Again the only contact I've had with her is her asking me to give her money........What do I do?

[SLBG]

Hi Timmer,

 

Don't pay up, if she lived with you and you shared 5 years of you life together money shouldn't be the issue.

 

If she wants her futon back then let her have it. Its not your problem that she does not have room for it.

 

When you live with somebody you learn to share, if it's a girlfriend then I would expect that you both contributed financially towards things. For her to ask for money back is a bit funny. She left you, she made her choice now she should live by them.

 

I understand that you want her back but if you pay up she may never speak 2 you again and would of only used you to get some money out of you.

 

Maybe I have it all wrong, correct me if that is the case. I don't want to sound harsh but you cannot pay up.

 

As for you friend, was they really a friend. Friends don't do things like that. You have to ask your self what sort of a friend does what they did. Was the friendship really worth anything.

 

I wouldn't resort to violence, be the better man. Rise above it, make sure they no they are no friend of your and let them go and mess with somebody else's life.

[S4il]

Well welcome to the site, i myself am from the Chicago land area (Aurora/Naperville)

 

About this Futon, (sounds like a Judge Judy case) well i have to laugh about this, i think it was kind of funny that she is *almost* or IS demanding money for it, b/c you still have it...and she doesn't have any room for it, tell her to rent a place for storage. (that would put her in her place) b/c if you think about it, your holding it for her, why is she asking for money? your almost being used for your storage...so that is where i started to laugh (If she continues with this plan of action, demanding money for it, just give it to her on her doorstep, with a note saying "It's Not my Problem anymore" and leave it at that)

 

And plus she has the nerve to ask you for some MORE money, for personal items that were purchased while dating, PAH ! i find this to be out of pocket, she is obviously upset, really upset about something, and she doesn't want to say what, perhaps jealous.

 

material things that are bought while in the relationship should either be,

 

A. Kept,

or

B. Thrown Out...burned to ashes, ashes to dust..etc..

 

As for the money spent on the items...well it's not like anyone was holding a gun to her head, telling her to buy it, Right? it was out of LOVE for eachother (put that out in the open and see what she says)

 

But it seems as though your in a tough bind b/c from what you said.

 

I still have the deepest of feelings for her and would walk the Sahara on my hands backwards to have another chance with her

 

can we say.....CHECKMATE

 

don't make it seem like you would do anything, and everything for her at the drop of a hat, but i get the feeling that is to late, and i think she picks up on that..She uses it to her advantage..You need to cut your ties, and learn to become more "respectful" and dependant with yourself, instead of with her controling ways..that gets you no where with women.

 

Do you feel like a Doormat? if so change that..as for the friend who said all the things behind your back, Forget about beating him senseless...just make sure he gets what he wanted, that being "HER" from what it seems like anyways..And let her CONTROL HIM, Not you!

[SLBG]

Well said S4il

 

I agree, drop her futon off at her place, leave a note and then forget about it.

 

Alternatively, send her a bill for $500. If she thinks you are a storage company then treat her like a customer.

 

That will slow her down a peg or two.

 

LOL

[tiger_lilies]

In my opinion, she's being really cheap! She should not be lowering herself to ask you for money after your breakup. Who does that? She should've cut her loses. I think this makes her look bad.

[Out to sea]

Hi ya, sorry but why can't she sell the god damn thing if she needs the money, I think she is more interested in the argument with you. If you say you want her back then maybe take it easy on her, she is obviously angry but will cool off in time. Stay in touch but under no circumstances give her a cent. Really people, who does that!!! Has to be about something else. And about that mate, well they say what comes around goes around, worry not about him, he'll get his!!!