What should I do?

[aloneagain]

Well,its been on hard me at least with my g/f leaving so far away because of college. We try to talk almost everynight and we share almost everything about each other. But lately she's been telling me she has been hanging out with her best friend more(a guy). I dont mind and I'm not the jealous type. I know she cares about him deeply since the moment I met her she told me about him and he also goes to that college. ok. So far so good, no big deal. No problems.

 

But recently,its been getting really awkward. He wrote a song for her with romantic intuendos asking her to be "his" with him knowingly we are together. When she told me about this she just said "He was really hot". Which is something new to me since she has never told anyone "hot" especially not to me. And she wrote a poem for him filled with romantic gestures. She said she was also going to give me his poem since she it also "fit" and didnt have to write one for me. ok. No big deal. I dont mind.

 

And up until yesterday, she told me she went to go see movies at his house because he was gone for a week and she missed him so she couldnt wait to be with him. She ended up spending the night at his house. ok. No big deal, there best friends. I say.

 

But when I talked to her today she said they woke up in the same bed. And she felt so comfortable with him sleeping there with her. She also said " I wish I could wake up like that every morning". And it hurts now. It really hurts.

 

She says she doesnt want to meet my mom and spends most of her time with his family (his family adores her). For Valentines Day I didnt even ask her to be mine because as soon as I had talked to her that day she said she was already his valentine.

 

Recently shes been giving me hints that I should get a g/f here so I wont be to lonely and such. I told her I had her and it didnt matter but she just passed it off and changed the topic.

 

I've talked to her about how I feel about this. Ive even told her if wants to be with him to just tell me,and not go on like this. I love her deeply.

 

What should I do now? Should I tell her to just leave me and be happy with him. Should I break it off? It really hurts now and I'm using less than elusive methods to cope with this.

 

I dont know anymore, maybe I'm just insecure and stop crying about it.

 

Thank you for taking the time to read about my problem without any obligation. I really apreciated it.

[P-Frenchie]

From the get go everything you described happening would make many guys furious (and with good reason). Exchanging songs/poems with love inuendos is already too far. I can't believe she slept in the same bed with another guy. She seems to be telling you that she's no longer into the long-distance relationship, but is trying to get you to break things off so she doesn't feel guilty. This is not a healthy relationship and is not fair to you at all. You need to get out of it because you're only going to get hurt.

[Chrysalis_77]

I agree with Frenchie,

It's not fair situation for you, Aloneagain. Think you should tell her how you feel and see her reaction.

She's gone too far by sleeping in the same bed with another guy.

I hope things will be ok soon for you.

[aloneagain]

Thank you both for your reponses. She just said that there best friends and it was comforting to sleep with him. "Its not like were going to have sex".

 

I dont want to break things because I still have strong feelings for her.

[P-Frenchie]

I understand what you're going through, but in the long run your feelings will get the best of you. She may not be having sex with this guy, and might not ever, but that doesn't mean it's acceptable. Also, she is putting herself in a position where it could lead to more intimate situations. After all, it has already gone this far. Even if they aren't having sex, it is in no way fair to you. I understand you still love this girl, but she doesn't love you to the same extent if this is how she is going to act; she's not even considering your feelings. Feel free to PM me if you want to have a personal chat about the matter.