what do i do if i run into her during "no contact"

[brillyfresh]

i've decided to give the "no contact" approach a shot, so she will get curious and intrigued by me again and my absense in her life ... the problem is, what do i do if she does get curious and contact me? or what if i run into her by chance when i'm out and about?

 

i know that i will not initiate the contact, as that is a big no-no, but if she initiates contact, and tells me something like "i love you", how do i respond to that? should i tell her i love her back? or is that exactly what i SHOULDN'T do?

 

she asked me to give her time and space, which i intend to do, for the sake of any future relationship i might have with her, and for my own sake while i improve myself and my life to become sufficiently irresistible to her

 

it's still very soon since i last talked to her, only 3 days, so i figured i would ask this before the situation arose ... but if she came to me to talk about us, what stance should i take at this point? i certainly don't want to lose her, at any cost, and i very much want to be with her again, fix what problems we had, and only look forward, to a happy future together

[Happy_Go_Lucky_Heb]

Hey: try this link removed

 

Hope it helps.

 

HappyHeb

[brillyfresh]

it really does, thank you

 

i know though that it is only a rough outline, because i have already broken some of those rules, and the week after she broke up with me was a classic case of what not to do, making it only 10 times harder for me now, for each time i contacted her

 

it covers how to handle "i miss you" but what about a more profound statement, like "i love you"? do i return it, or say something like "i know you do", or is that just way out of line?

 

now i think i know what to say if they ask "do you still love me?" ... just ask them a question back (a little reverse psychology): "what does your heart tell you?" (with a good smile on your face of course) ... that way, you don't give them a straightforward answer, which might make them mad, but hopefully might really make them think "what DOES my heart tell me?" ... do you think a response like that is a good idea?

[brillyfresh]

here's what is also complicated:

 

she moved out of my place, but some of her belongings are still here, so i know she will call to get her stuff, and seeing her will be inevitable

 

how should i handle that upcoming encounter?

[Foreigner]

If she tells you she loves you and you don't want to tell her you love her too you can tell "I know...

 

As for how to behave... Don't exude what makes her want space (clingyness, lack of independence, need) but the opposite. Make yourself feel as a complete and happy person even if you're without her (and do whatever you need to FEEL that). This doesn't necessarily mean that you should stop love her or want her to stay with you. It only means that whatever her choice is (and she's free to make it) - you'll remain a happy, complete and balanced person and will find a way out of the sadness.

 

These were my $.02...

 

~F.