Why can't he say I LOVE YOU ???

[Lydia G.]

We've been together for almost 3 months. We are together all the time. We've met eachothers families and we spend time with them. We go on romantic getaways every weekend. We have future plans. He tells me I'm the best thing thats ever happened to him. So, Why can't he say "I love You" ?? I need to hear the words. It hurts me so much that I am thinking of ending the realtionship.

[Miche]

Lydia, I think that you have a potentially really good relationship. Three months really hasn't been a long time. You two are still in the 'getting to know each other' phase of the relationship. I'm sure that he really cares about you, but he may not want to rush into anything. Don't break up with him simply because he hasn't said "I love you." Does he SHOW you that he loves you? Actions speak louder than mere words. Have you ever witnessed a relationship where individuals would always say "I love you" but would constantly abuse the other person that they claim to "love?" Whether it be psychological, verbal, or physical abuse- you would probably say that it isn't really love right? Love isn't suppose to hurt.

 

thereforeeee, if you see your partner showing you that he loves you, but not necessarily saying it, then give him time. Then, further down in the relationship, like maybe 6 months, if he still hasn't said it, just nicely ask him if he loves you. But don't complain about why he doesn't say it to you. Nagging him may turn him off. Would you prefer him to tell you that he loves you and yet treat you like your nothing? I'm sure you'd say "no." Three months really isn't a long time, so just relax, and take it slow. You don't have to rush into anything.

 

ALL THE BEST TO YOU GIRL!!!!!

[JSHRN]

Hi Lydia.

 

I think you're putting too much pressure on your boyfriend. The reality is that a man can never come on too slow with a girl, only too fast.

 

Personally, I think a sure fire way to sabotage a potentially great relationship is to come on heavy verbally; reveal too much about yourself too soon; and let a woman know that you are really interested in her. I think most women prefer a man of mystery.

 

Slow down. You are probably creating a problem here by being so insistent on his giving you the answers that you want to hear. (I don't think threatening to end the relationship will get him to say those 3 words). This sounds a little too much like "love me or I'll kill you."

 

Talk to him about your feelings for him and your views on the relationship. Since you already have future plans you have a very open communication with each other. But please - don't force him to say I love you. There are other ways to say 'I love you' without actually speaking the words.

 

JSHRN