Moving out + parents

[lonelyd00d]

Hi everyone,

 

There are sortof 2 topics here, but they're intertwined/connected :

 

For quite some time now, I've been thinking about moving out.. One of the major reasons would be my parents.. They're not really driving me crazy or anything.. but I simply don't have a whole lot of privacy. And besides, I just can't communicate with 'em. I think that would improve if we didn't spend so much time together. And by together, I mean, almost living in the same room all the time.

 

I hope that makes some sense.. It's -really- hard for me to put this situation to words..

 

Okay, the main question remains.. Moving out? What are your experiences on that? Cos my brother will be moving out of his current house, which would mean that I could move there instead (for an affordable price).. However, I live awesome here now. Hmm.. Perhaps I should put this in a list :

 

good :

- No chores like preparing food, or doing laundry, etc.

- No neighbors that could complain about my stereo being noisy

- Cheap living

- Access to a 'baby grand' (I've been playing piano for 14 years now)

- Nice view out of my window (is important to me)

 

bad :

- Parents are always around (and they're not really the supportive kind)

- They (dad) always bother my guests with their stuff.. It wouldn't be the first time that someone would be coming to visit me, but end up talking to my parents most of the time... (it's not like I ever 'kidnap' THEIR guests! )

- I feel very restricted in everything I do

 

 

Besides, I'm not sure I'm ready to move out.. And definitely not sure whether I want to live where my brother's living now.. although, that's probably the only thing I can afford for a while..

 

I know I haven't been able to really put this down as well as I had hoped, but I think the main idea is coming through.. If not, ask away.

[Mar]

I'll tell you right now, the reality of moving out and the allure of it is FAR more difficult than the reality! I moved out of my house when I was 18, in with a couple of friends, and I'm now 30 and have JUST NOW been able to pay my bills (somewhat) on time without collection agencies breathing down my neck. There were more times than I can count where I had to bum money off of my parents in order to eat Spagettios or some other non-food substance. My heat was off a couple of times because I couldn't afford to fill the oil tank, and my landlords took pity on me and filled it for me once or twice.

 

Be VERY sure you can handle a VERY slim budget if you decide to move out. The parental aggravation is annoying to no end, I quite understand that, but the "real world" of paying bills on time is quite the cruel slap in the face for anyone just moving out. Have substantial savings, because you're going to need them. The best accountant can't figure groceries-our friends used to bring my roommates and I cases of Ramen noodle soups in pity because we had no food....lol

 

Work out a budget for yourself, a REALISTIC budget.......car insurance, gas, groceries, utilities, rent, "incidentals" (i.e. "garbage"), all of it. You should have a nice sum left over after all of that after figuring in all of the necessities. If you're just squeaking in over the wire, you won't make it, I can tell you that right now.

 

Just be realistic, is all I can keep stressing. Take into account beer binges, parties, CD's, clothes, all of it. Those were the things that KILLED me. It's very hard not to celebrate your independence by a wild spending spree that leaves you in the hole!

[lonelyd00d]

=)

 

Thanks for your concern.. But in my case, I don't think money will be the biggest problem (although, at the moment, I'm not making as much as half a year ago.. ).. I'm more struggling about taking the mental step to independence.. I don't want to move my stuff over there, only to figure out I'm not going to hack it on my own, and then move back in with my parents..

 

Don't get me wrong, my parents are very nice people, I guess I just grew very tired of 'em by now.. (not surprising, after living with 'em for 24 years, now)..

 

Also, I'll be living on my own then.. at least for a while. And I won't have many friends over (and no beer binges, that's for sure ; ), since I don't have many friends to start with.. =|

[Colls]

Hey im not gunna say ne thing about living costs and things cuz i dont kno about that, but i can guess its hard. But, when my older brother moved out of the house, he became so much more closer with my parents. They respected eachother more, adn my bro would ocme over for dinner all the time. They all got along great after he moved out, whereas when he was in the house they fought constantly and never got along. Hes so much more happier on his own, even though my mom is still halping with some of his costs so he can make something of himself for the future. So good luck if u move out, it may be just what u need.

[Cid]

I moved out when I was 18 but I had to move back in, but I just moved out agen about 5 month ago and every thing is going good for right now. Some times we just need to do things like this just to find out who we really are.