What do I do now??

[sadwithouthim]

Hi I have posted before about my situation. Here is a quick recep. My boyfriend of 3 and 1/2 years came home from a 5 month stay in Iraq in August and broke up with me in November claiming he needed "space" and that he thought we argued more since he has been home. The problem is that he is still renting the apartment that is attached to my parents house. We were supposed to be living there together. He broke up with and the same day moved into the apartment. I thought he was just going through things since he has been home from War but he does not seem to want anything to do with me. It has been two months and all he says is that he does not know if we will get back together and it is not fair of him to tell me not to date anyone else. The problem is that I still want to be with him and love him so much. We discussed marriage and he had told me when he returned from iraq that we would soon be engaged. What should I do? Do I tell him to leave the apartment? (He is hardly there b/c he travels a lot for work) And should I wait around for him? Please help! Advice is really needed!!

[kuhl282000]

Hey Girl

 

I'm very sorry you are having to go through all of this, especially when you guys have made some promises about life changing events like getting married. We'll you are in a real pickel because he is so close. And because you care so much, you more than likely can't wait to see him. Only to get let down and have your heart broke. You want him to say all the right things so you two can get back together, and the words never come. And that can really hurt. I think you said in your post he wanted space. I think he is telling you something. And it may be something you don't want to hear. I know I would not want to be in a situation where my old girlfriend was living in the house behind me. That would kill me. I think the guy needs to move somewhere else. And that would give you some well needed time to heal. It takes time to heal. And seeing this guy all the time only keeps the wound open. Sounds like he wants to move on, and you should take a look at that. I found that when they say they want space (what is the space thing anyway) it is a nice way of letting you down. Because they don't want to hurt you as bad. If it is your parents house you may want to consult with them and tell them how it makes you feel him living so close. And if the guy has a caring bone in his body, he should know this is up setting you anyway. I would not put to much hope in getting this guy back.

You can't make someone esle love you. It is 2004 tonight time to make a clean break and a fresh start. Good Luck !!!!

 

Warm Regards

Kuhl

P.S. If it is any helps any, I had a girl that told me we were getting married and going to spend the rest of our lives together. It never happened. You never really know what happens sometimes in the name of love. We fall in love with jerks, but the pain still hurts just the same. Try and heal !!!!

[sadwithouthim]

Thanks so much for the reply and words of advice! I will never understand the meaning of space either. I really just don't get why he would not move out on his own. I know deep down if he truly loved me he would not be hurting me so bad. I guess I have to get up the nerve to tell him to leave. It is strange how you think you know someone and they turn around and become a complete stranger.

I am sorry to hear that you experienced a similiar situation, but it is comforting to know that there are others out there who have gone through the same things.

It is just the worst feeling in the world to be in love with someone who does not love you back! I am hoping this year will be better than the last!