New friend "sank into oblivion"

[Coleen]

I really need an advice. I posted earlier about being friends with a guy. So, I decided to try and see how it goes. Note that the guy actually initiated our communication. So, we've exchanged two e-mails and he hasn't responded to my last one (and it's been over a week now). I don't know what to think. I'm just trying to let it go, and not think about it, but it just bugs me that he wouldn't respond. It's like he was looking for self-reassurance and now that he's got it, he doesn't bother to "give back". I almost feel used

Should i just forget him, or should I try and send him another e-mail curiously asking what was up? We don't know each other well and we're not close, so I feel like i don't have a right to be demanding. Anyway, my writing must be a mess, heh. Thanks for reading! Any ideas, comments?

[Haven]

When I run into situations like that and I really want to keep talking to the person, I'll send another email that sort of adds on to the previous email. You could try that - either give clarification on something you said in the original email, or note something recent that happened (a funny story, or anything that's relevant).

 

Usually I have varying degrees of success. I've learned that people who actually care about talking to you WILL respond after you send the second email. You definitely don't have to be/sound demanding. If you just send him a quick, short email adding on to the previous one, and maybe asking a direct question that he will respond to, that may do the trick.

[Gratsy]

I think that if you're unsure of what to do in these situations, its better to do nothing. Don't sit around wondering why he didn't respond...you are way too cool of a person to do that. If it bothers you enough, sure, write him again. But don't worry about it, he'll respond or he won't respond, you know? Its too early to be overanalyzing. Women kill themselves with the overanalyzing.

[Creative]

I wish i can give you some insights since I do encourage friendship between male/female. Are you guys going to see each other? If so, then use that opportunity to get a more interactive contact, such as IM.

[Coleen]

Hey guys! Thanks for your advice!!

 

Haven, I would send him something, but that's just not how I would behave. Although if I really wanted a contact with somebody I probably would find a way to do it (so that's smth to keep in mind)

 

Gratsy, yes, you're right. I'm overanalyzing. So, i'll just let it go, and not stress about it.

 

Creative, we saw each other regularly (just as acquaintances, we even rarely spoke). But I don't know if we're going to see each other again or not. For now, i've decided to drop it. We'll see what happens later.

[Haven]

Haven, I would send him something, but that's just not how I would behave. Although if I really wanted a contact with somebody I probably would find a way to do it (so that's smth to keep in mind)

 

You don't ever clarify things or ask questions? That's a pretty common behavior, I believe.

 

I guess you just have to decide what's more important to you, your belief that you cannot send another email if your first one hasn't been responded to, OR your potential friendship with this guy.