Its been 2 weeks today!

[msfoolish]

We have been broken up 2 weeks today. Its so hard! I'm still so sad. this breakup has brought out a lot of issues. I was a lot older than my partner, and now he's out with gorgeous girls his own age having fun and i wonder why he was ever with me and if i'll ever meet someone again!

 

We talked about the age gap all the time and it was never a problem until now. He said he cant give me what i want now and i wont be able to give him what he want when he wants it. He says he still loves me, thats why breaking up is so hard but he says its the right and fair thing to do at this time.

 

That said, i still love him so much and it doesn't stop hurting, i cry every day and i feel broken. i invested so much into this relationship and i feel very foolish because i honestly thought we would be together forever! Do you think he's just being nice when he says he still loves me? I dont think he can cos if he did surely he'd still be here and we could talk about things, go to counselling and maybe compromise. But he's not willing to do this.

 

Yesterday i felt a bit better about things and was kind of angry, now i just feel awful again. cos i'm older i feel lke i should be handling it better, but i cant quite seem to rationalise and see that its for the best like he does. H e was my world.

 

Please help XXXX

[Clabs]

Hey hun

 

It sucks to have up and down days, doesn't it?

 

Those feelings that you still love him and invested so much time in him and the feelings of foolishness because you thought this was it are perfectly normal - it doesn't make it much easier right now but at least you know you are not going off your rocker!

 

Just because you are a bit older does not mean you should be handling it any better.

 

It is natural to feel like you will never meet anyone ever again - that nobody will love you again - rejection is a nasty emotion.

 

Darling - of course you will find someone again - of course you will fall in love again - but you have to get through this stuff first.

 

Take it easy - it is early days and this is not a race - take time to be sad if you need to be. But realise also that you will get through this.

 

Mark

[msfoolish]

I know its just hard to see him out enjoying himself, and him still saying that he loves me thats why its so hard to breakup. It doesn't seem to be that hard for him! Do you think that talk of still loving me is to ease his guilt or is it just BS so he doesnt look bad to toher people? He did cry to my brother last week, saying he didnt know what to do.

 

Think i'm just clutching at straws of hope that he'll change his mind!

[Clabs]

Hey hun

 

Goodness knows why they say that stuff and what is going through their heads! But my take is that if you really love someone you cannot wait to be with them, right? Where is he?

 

We all clutch at straws when things go pear shaped - we hope they will change their minds and ask us back. But there has to come a time where you decide that actually, you are better than this - better than sitting about moping and waiting for someone to decide if you are the best thing since sliced bread or not. Who needs someone like that in your life?

 

Your best bet is to not try and find out what he is up to - tell friends etc that you don't wanna hear about it. And stop contact with him - because it will just wind you up and make you feel crap again.

 

Take care hun - keep posting on here - keep trying to move forwards.

 

Mark

[soulalone]

The best thing to do is go through all the emotions. It is very hard and difficult especially if you have invested your lives together in a relationship. It hurts we all know that.

 

Be strong, get out there. Try a new hobby, go bungee jumping, do something that you always wanted to do and never had the time to do. Take up an activity like cooking try baking. It helps, I've started to make different friends and also meet people with the same interests as me.

 

You will be okay. It's okay to cry and be sad.

 

Go for a walk.

 

You are in my thoughts....it will get better.