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Back in December, I broke up with my now ex-gf of 9 nine months. She was abusive, unsupportive, and overall toxic person. She wasn't all bad though, and we did have some fun times together. Since then, I've been doing the NC thing. I'm currently in a new relationship now, but I still can't help but think about my ex. I don't want her back, but I'm curious about she is doing. What is wrong with me? She treated me like dirt, yet I'm wondering about her. A month after the breakup, she did try to call me. I didn't answer, and there was no voicemail. Maybe that has something to do with it, but I don't know. I don't want to screw up the relationship I am in now.

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It's natural to think about exes, even ones that treated you like dirt. We get nostalgic about the good times we did share with that person--and even in the most abusive of relationships, there are undoubtedly good times to reminisce about--and we might even reconsider the wisdom of breaking up with that person. But, it is absolutely critical to remember that you did in fact have legitimate and irrevocable--at least at the time--grievances with the person and you broke up with them for a reason. It's unlikely that the basis for your break-up has changed and that you would be any happier with them now.


However, don't beat yourself up over thinking of her. Everyone does. Those thoughts will fade with time.

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I am in the shoes of your ex-girlfriend... sort of.


My ex broke up with me because I was controlling and WHATEVER... but anyway, I called him and he ignored my phone calls and I never left a message.


It's been 2 weeks since we have spoken.


Sorry, I'm getting side-tracked. Anyways! Keep on truckin' and doing what you're doing... it's natural to feel curious about what your ex is up to. If you think calling her and talking to her will set you back, then don't do it.


Weird thing is... there are always those people that can really mess you up in the head, but somehow you can't stop thinking about them!

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