How to keep the "Spark" Alive

[S4il]

Just something I'd like to hear your "opinion" on especially all the women reading this, but men feel free, i encourage you to add your idea's on this question.

 

"what does a Guy do, or what can he do to keep the " spark" or * light* on, towards a girl to keep her interested."

 

is it really summed up in the "Cat Mouse Game" show a little take a little, give only what you have been given from the girl say, the flirting, the contact...keep heavy conversations to a minimum (meaning how long they last) is it really that the guy must present a "hard to get" attitude to keep that girl around, and keep the spark alive..

 

cause use (men in general) i should say know that when wee show too much,.... everything drops, i remember a Few members in here (men) talking about the level of interest isn't there anymore between someone he was interested in, example the member Turboz he explained in depth his frustrations about a girl he meet and how she just didn't see him as someone interesting anymore.

 

Is this because the man showed to much of himself...can this be in relation to what i said above, playing hard to get??? does it almost have to be that way, or at least similar...? ( i know so many questions) I'm just trying to break this down for myself, so i can understand what works best...? any suggest are greatly appreciated.

 

ThAnKs

[Bluebird]

My guy doesnt have to do anything to keep me interested..as long as he loves me...and continues to show that all the time then i will be happy.

[JaimeNLuv]

well women are like men... want what they can't have. In my case, usually I can not stand a man that is constantly calling and chasing me... but when they reject me!!!! OOOOOHHH I am the cat. Heck look at my posts.. I can't handle it. so yes, in my case, cat and mouse game works. as for other women, they like all the attention. For me, when they stop showing me attention I get a little .. hmm how shall we say? Offended? then I vye for it again and then back and forth it goes. Keeps my attention.

[S4il]

Well speaking before a relationship starts, notice attraction and flirting as the context i put this under..(no offence)

 

You are correct i can totally agree with you on what you said, the "unconditional Love" is there and strong than the relationship stay solid..but this i guess this directed towards "BEFORE" you have love for someone, lets say meeting, or at least your intentions are too become something more than Friends.

 

P.s. to the other poster... "Thanks Jamie this is starting to make some sense.... i can relate to that feeling myself, if you play the cat mouse game, is it all worth it at the end, that END being what exactly...i would think starting a relationship...because you have ended the game, and something has commenced, the love is there, the connection, but is the LIGHT>..that spark..does it still exist? do people often find themselves ending relationships because they are bored, ESP women with the guy, they have learned everything about him, he has expressed his feelings, thoughts, and his love..so what else is there?"

 

the million dollar question i guess.

[JaimeNLuv]

exactly I know what you mean. I am also talking about before love. There are guys that were trying to date me and they just annoyed me with "too much" and then the ones that are kond of nonchalant got my attention. It is like a chess game. Basically. I am just speaking from my own feelings and my own way of thinking. I liek a challenge.

[caliboy]

the "cat and mouse" you mentioned is part of the game two people play at the start of a relationship. after the two have become closer, then the games aren't necessary. BUT both people should always have their owns lives along with each other. as in both people should have their own friends, job, hobbies, etc. this way they don't lose their independance which could help in not letting things get dull between each other. and i personally think laughter is the best "spice" of all. keep her laughing and stay witty and she'll keep liking you.

[JaimeNLuv]

Perfectly said Caliboy... sometimes in a relationship you forget about the rest of the world and then when it is over you have to start fresh cause everybody is gone

[JaimeNLuv]

As for why they end, I don't know. Maybe it is boredom. That is a great thought. I will think on that for a while and get back to you. I like to put things out there for complete understanding and maybe getting a whole feel of everything

[vfunkera]

hey,

 

i got quite a few stuff to say here because i fell victim to this and i have learned alot.

 

ok remember women always want what they cant have. Since alot of them are insecure and not soring in confidence, a guy who has got self esteem that is quite high appears quite attractive to them, and women/girls will never usually make the first move on this guy because they are simply to shy or believe that the guy is too good for them. If guys dont follow, then imagine Britney walking in the room. Would you have the confidence to approach her and start flirting? Its the same with girls and confident guys.

 

Humour, good looks, dominance, and ambition all make up the great catch- the ultimate man that all women will desire.

Proper male attitude made up of: Confidence, Control and Challenge

 

Girls always want a challenge, something that they can change or fix to suit them. Its in their genes. Thats why the element of challenge is so important in dating. Indeed cat and mouse basically means challenging the other person. In my next relationship i will be trying to play hard to get and appear challenging until my girl will finally be so into me. Only then will i let the walls in my heart down and let myself love her. By then i will be in the stage BlueBird was mentioning earlier, and love will take over from there.

 

If you start treating a woman like precious gold, she will believe she is gold. And once she believes it, she will DUMP YOU because YOU have given her the sense that she is BETTER than you. Once she thinks that, she will want to REPLACE YOU with someone better (more challenging), because you have given her reasons to believe that YOU ARE UNWORTHY OF HER GREATNESS.

 

After all, if we think we can find someone better, we will. This holds true for both men and women. The last thing we want to settle for is a mate when we could have gotten better

 

It is like a chess game

 

My ex played this challenge game and i am proof that it worked. By the end of 4 months, i was attached to her and couldnt believe that someone like her had picked a bozo like me (before i went out with her i used to think that she wasnt very good looking or stunning and i could do better!).

 

The lesson: DON'T GIVE HER A REASON TO THINK SHE IS BETTER. You are the gold; she should be thrilled just to have a CHANCE with you. Thats why a confident guy always attracts.

 

BUT both people should always have their owns lives along with each other. as in both people should have their own friends, job, hobbies, etc. this way they don't lose their independance which could help in not letting things get dull between each other

 

They will want you more if you are a challenge. How? Get a second life with out them. Appear more challenging. Eliminate all your desperation signs- don't:

--always giving the woman attention.

--call all the time (and immediately once getting the number,

immediately returning a call, being at her beck and call, etc.)

--take every opportunity to talk to them and tell them everything

about yourself right away.

--always be available.

--NEVER be willing to walk away-(NEVER willing to disagree, ALWAYS supplicating).

 

Make sure that they are really really 'into you' until you start putting all your efforts and time into this one girl. If you act like they are your 'whole life' and that 'you would roll up into a ball and cry if they left' before then, they will dump you in seconds flat. Challenge is gone. You have been conquered. Check mate. If you want a long term relationship, make sure they are 'in love' with you first before you can start getting in to them.

 

Good luck,