She put me in NC :(

[mr.wrong]

I'm back. If you read my previous post, I was put on hold with my relationship so that my girlfriend could figure herself out with some issues she was having with depression and health problems. Well last night she simply continued to say that she loved me and has loved me more than anyone else she's ever known, but that she was saying goodbye now because she can't do it anymore.

Can someone tell me why someone can say they love you but just can't love you? Or why its just too hard to say I love you when you actually feel it?

Anyways, she now put me in NC and basically took my hope away. Am I stupid for still having some hope. What do you do to not lose the one you love, and not have them lose you since they love you?

[equinox]

No one can tell you why they, and by they I assume you mean women, do that. Some thing very similar happened to a friend of mine, she told him that she loved him and always would but that it was over. Doesn't make sense does it eh. Maybe things like that only make sense to women.

 

To be honest it just sounds like she wants your releationship to be over but that she wants you to feel better than if she just said it's over. The point is, what she's done is selfish. She's put herself before you, now tell me, does that sound like love? My advice to you is to forget her.

[Romantic Fool]

Am going through the almost identical situation so I can feel your pain. If you have the patience wait...Your in NC anyway put in effect by her..Do it yourself and heal yourself, but don't give up just don't contact. Maybe she'll come around, but in the meantime you've fixed yourself as well as possibly moved on. Thats what I'm doing and thats my only advice to you.

[jomb28]

It's been a month now when i experienced this, it's really painful and i still love my ex. i don't know what she's up to at the moment. what i'm doing now is not expecting too much that she'll come back to me. if she comes back that's good. all my focus right now is myself. i get back to gym to avoid depression. i still don't have contact with her

[Hosvius]

i would offer the same as "romantic fool" take this time to have fun and better your self. reflect on what could have caused this and work on preventing it from happening again. if she loves you she will return with out a doubt. stay in NC and be patient. my ex has put me in NC and i undoubtingly know i mean somthing to her. they just have to figure it out on their own, the balls in their court.

[mr.wrong]

Thank you for your advice, I really appreciate it. I'm just a little lost right now. I've gotten into the wrong habits for getting over her. I've started smoking again, I don't really like it and I want to quit, its just too easy. I understand the whole NC thing and I'm really going to have to learn to abide by it. It's just hard when that person is your best friend and they are the one that you just want to tell everything to. It is true, the ball is in her court. And I thank you for the optimism in saying that "If she truly loves you she will come back without a doubt". That kind of thinking is what keeps me able to work on NC. The problem with getting over this one is that this love, at least on my part was unconditional (as much as that can be without being God). There wasn't much she could have done that would make me not love her again. Since it was like this for me I knew that I was going to marry her, and she made those statements too. It would have been a year together soon and I wanted to propose this fall but thats kind of out of the question now.

[HoTung]

i know the feeling. slowly i am realising my ex just doesn't love me. how long does it take for them to realise they love u?

 

good luck ...but life goes on - its very hard but it does

 

i still want him back but am\pushing him away

[mr.wrong]

Yes thats my problem, pushing her away. I keep telling her how simple our situation is since she still loves me. But she won't change...what I keep doing is only driving her further away and I don't know how to act any other way...

[cr44hill]

my ex put me in NC as well. we had been LC and I sent her an email getting some things off my chest, pointing out where she went wrong in the relationship. It was not a soft email but also was not untrue in my mind. She said I was trying to cast blame, I said I accepted my part but for her to not accept any way disengenous. She ended her email "Please do not contact me, XXXXX". T

 

hat was 2 weeks ago, 4 weeks before that she said she loved me but our relationship had been too toxic. Talk about mixed signals. part of me was glad she said to go NC but now I'm missing her more again. It is tough, but if they say don't contact, that's a pretty clear message.

[rtoycrow]

I am kind of in the same position as you except me and my ex continue to talk and see each other. She is young (19 and i am 28 ) and wants to just have fun and date other people but she continues to tell me that she loves me and she always will. That is kind of bad though because it kills me knowing that she is dating other guys but i told her that i am ok with it even though it hurts because i don't want to push her away. I feel in my heart will will eventually be together but I am putting my trust in God and hoping he will bring us back together again.

[mr.wrong]

I think I've lost all my trust in God. He brought us together...I'm pretty sure he took us apart. And there is no reason for it. I'm really struggling with NC.

[Romantic Fool]

I think I've lost all my trust in God. He brought us together...I'm pretty sure he took us apart. And there is no reason for it. I'm really struggling with NC.

 

If your going to refer to religion and God are you sure its not the devil that took you apart? If you are religious and believe in a bigger power...He never intends for you to suffer thats the devils work and one that looses faith in Gods greater plan...Have faith if its meant to be it will.

[Hosvius]

i agree with Romantic fool, God would never put you in harms way. he only intents are for the best in you. even though you might not agree with the way he has directed you, it can only be the best for you. God put me and myex together undoubtingly as we were both in a time of need when we met. he took us apart and can put as back together. NEVER lose faith in god he is always watching out. WORRY is a small form of atheism. do not worry. god will lend you his strength in all your needs. i got to church every Sunday and try to do my best in everything i do. keep the faith either way you will come out on top!