update on my story

[smiles314]

Hey all.. I know its been awhile since I've posted up here but things are pretty hetic with me. I'm now back at college for my 3rd year here.. I just wanted to give a quick update about my situation for all of those who remember situation and heart ache over the summer.. For anybody interested just see my old posts. They explain it all.

 

Well now going on the 3rd yr of having some weird relationship with my ex bf. I finally saw him after not seeing him the whole summer. When we saw each other, those same old feelings and same old looks came back once again.. SOmetimes it's exhausted how those feelings just never seem to leave. In the beginning, it seemed like my ex was very interested in trying to build something back and getting comfortable with me again. He took me out to dinner and we caught up which was nice, and he cooked me dinner. We still fooled around and have that physical connection there. It has been almost 3 months and we see each other about once a week, sometimes more sometimes less. Now I always have a great time when we are together. BUt lately, he has been involved in his school work, he isn't doing that well in school and he supposedly needs time to study which he rarely ends up doing. He also is busy working about 8 hrs 4 times a week. And he always ends up hanging with his buddies out their house and basically drinking and smoking pot. I'm not asking him to not be a 20 yr old college guy. BUt lately, I feel that he has been lazy with me and is just not interested in giving me anymore. I guess I can't blame him, not every guy in college wants that full time relationship. He has given some lame excuses, like he isn't comfortable with me yet, or he doesnt know how much longer he'll be in school, because he thinks he may get kicked out which really isn't feasible. I definitely feel like I want more.. Not necessarily a full time boyfriend, but I'm missing that romance and that sweetness of it all. Yes, i have told him this. And he says he just doesnt want anything serious right now, but there is always a possibility of something happening int he future. We are going on a school break in about 3 weeks for a month, and he says he doesnt want to start anything because of that. One excuse after the next. Since this has been going on for 2 years almost..I kind of think that he just doesn't want me as his girlfriend at all. He ims usually everyday, and we talk for awhile.. But something unusal happened the other day. We had hung out and fooled around, and that went fine. But he hasn't been around in a few days or online that much. Maybe I'm crazy but sometimes I think that means he is ignoring me. Although he hasn't been doing that lately. He has been pretty good talking to me a lot. I guess I just wanted to explain that i was so frustrated with him. How he always like to be iwth me, but just doesn't want what I want. I guess I know my own answer and I just have to stop this once and for all. I just wish he'd want to try to pursue this. I guess he just doesn't want to put in that effort for me.. Oh well.

 

Hope evryone else is good.

[The Morrigan]

It sounds like he likes you and enjoys your company - but on his terms. He's content to have things the way they are, to have his space to do as he wishes, while you're wanting more of an effort at least on an emotional level from him. If he's had 2 years and is still content to keep things as they are, I don't see that changing as long as you go along with it hoping he changes his mind. Frankly, I'd start looking at finding someone else who wants more and is willing to give more to you and a relationship than he is. It's never easy facing when someone's expectations and wants from a relationship and yours aren't matching up - but staying where you are it seems you're just going to feel let down and disappointed, and start maybe thinking it's something in you he doesn't want to commit to. From what you're saying though, it's not you, it's more that he's committed to himself first, and that's not something you can be responsible for or change, it has to come from him. I'd seriously take a personal inventory of what you want out of a relationship - and look for someone who's more sync with that, instead of investing more effort in something that's holding you in limbo.