Let him go

Day 379, 11 hours, 17 minutes and 44 seconds of NC. Is this how you are going to spend your lives?

HALE85, No need to thank me. The pleasure is all mine. Helping you is giving my life a purpose. In fact, i just log in for you basically. Its helping me move on in a way i can not explain. I will check your post tomorrow. Keep your next questions ready for me. Lol.Catch you later. Take care and keep smiling.

HALE85, Let me tell you one more little thing that made me sail smoothly since he left. I read the book, 'The Secret' by Rhonda Byrne. 'The Power' by the same author is also good. In fact, you can just read The Power. Its based on the law of attraction that says you can attract anything in your life. Although now that i have moved on, that book doesn't appeal me much but during distress it was miraculous for me.These are self-help books. They saved me from going into depression.Self-help books do serve a purpose.

HALE85, Hmmmm. May 2nd. That is good. See, if she wishes you that day then and only then we can decide if you have to wish her back. Your assumption is wrong. Nothing stops the girls from contacting someone they really want to be with. Whether you contact her yourself or not, that is insignificant. . . rather counterproductive. Let her come to you herself. You have done your job.

lonelyheart2, i am just like you. It sucks. Why can't we just let them go? I can't forget someone i love. Why do people change their loyalties so easily?

yeah, good luck. When is your birthday?

HALE85, I have been through all that. I am disappearing from his radar totally, now. No more contact with his friend. He will come back in May. In the beginning he might not realize, but in 6 to 8 months the reality will dawn upon him. When he comes back and starts teaching in the same university, he is gonna recall the good times when i was his student. There was no lust involved. It was a totally spiritual love. I was never revengeful. I gave him so much care, love and respect. Now, he won't find me anywhere. Even if he settles with some other girl, she won't love him the way i did.He is going to miss me badly. Regarding you, i must say that what you are doing is the right thing to do. You seem to be mature in dealing with relationships. For you maybe its not good to be hopeful. For me, the hope made me heal gradually. If you stop hoping, i do not think you can be peaceful after a breakup. I nurtured that hope in me for a long time. I am still hopeful but i am not in a hurry to win him. I know sometimes it takes months or a few years...but he will come back. By that time, i might have moved on completely. Your moving on is almost directly proportional to the return of your ex. One last word, keep your eyes on the long run. Stop counting days.....3rd day of NC, 4th day of NC. Sometimes, it takes months for your ex to come back. You just need to disappear from her radar completely. She shouldn't get to know about your whereabouts and there must be no common friends. Leave them alone for some time even if there are. Disappearing from her radar means that you do not exist for her. I hope she has your email address. She can contact you if she wants. Also, change your mobile number if she has it. I am telling you all the tricks that will push her emotional buttons. Be strong and positive. Take care.

HALE85, You will get her back one day. I can almost bet on that. Do not lose hope. Also, do not go for a rebound relationship. At the same time it is equally important for you to follow a strategy. I wish i knew about the NC rule before i messed up my life. Do not contact her because she seems to be undecided. Your absence will clear her mind. I do not think she can continue with her husband for long.Your absence will make her realize what you mean to her. Just go strong and no contact at all.If she contacts you herself, i would rather want you to discuss with me or someone experienced before replying her. I do not want you to mess it up, else you will be back to square one. Hey, all the other members.........please help HALE85. Why are you all so self-centered?

HALE85, One thing more, try to be positive about all that. People think that they can forget their past easily and make indecent haste by going for a rebound relationship. It doesn't work. I never blamed my ex. I wish him a very good life. Now, after around 2 years i feel he really wasn't meant for me. Whatever anybody tells you is not going to have any influence on you. Her return to you is almost guaranteed but i can not say when. Generally people are emotionally very insecure and at some stage want to go for the people who loved them. The key is really the NC. The NC is a win-win situation for you, anyway.

HALE85 Lol. I realized the mistake after posting that reply. What matters is that, let such people go. They are like parasites on your emotions.You have got all the right to lead your life to the fullest.

dumP1, you are an amazing man. I am really impressed by your carefree attitude. I wish i could be like you.

I have been waiting for a man for two years who went abroad for studying. He will come back in two months. He did not contact me for two years. Maybe because i have been in his radar through his best friend. Now, i have left everyone who could possibly tell him about me. When he comes back, he won't find me there. I showed him so much love. He was my teacher. I knew he had feelings for me too. His friend told me he still hasn't found any girl. He belongs to a humble background and has sacrificed his life for his parents and siblings. I told him that i am going to wait for him and will never marry anyone but he stopped replying to me. I do not think that he can ever forget my love. When he comes back and teaches in the same university, it will evoke my memories.

HALE85, I guess what you are doing is the right thing to do. Stick to the no contact rule. As far as the baby is concerned, i guess you better move on now. Forget about the baby. Just run away from him as far as you can. One day, he might come back. That day you won't be there for him. This is how life goes on.