MissDaisy

I think that there must be really specific factors in place for a breakup period to lead to getting back together. My brother and his wife are an example. He was with her for a year and he liked her, but became really nervous and afraid when he realised that she wanted to get married. He's a good man, but initially he was afraid of commitment and insecure about it. At first, he did the right thing which was to break up with her. He did not want to lead her on, or hurt her. For three months after the breakup he grew increasingly miserable... he went into therapy... talked about his fears... made a huge leap to understand what love really means and took a spiritual approach to it all. He got back together with her and in a few months he married her. I am proud of my brother because he was quite exceptional. He proved to be very good at dealing with his emotions and learning about himself. How many people are willing to do that? How many people truly have such an exceptional growth potential?Every time I experience a breakup with a guy that I think I am in love with, I desperately WISH that the guy could be more like my brother. In fact I still look for what I now call "my brother's syndrome". I look for potential growth sings in the guy and I hope that if I just let things be, just wait and be patient... he may come back... because he just needs to work on himself before he can eventually learn to love and make a commitment.... For me it never happens. My sister-in-law was EXTREMELY lucky!!