Sit back cause I'm sure this is going to be pretty long. I need as much advice I can get.
I am currently engaged to a women, we will call her 'Laura'. We had been dating for about 3 years when I asked her to marry me. We now have been engaged for about 6 months or so. Now throughout our relationship we have had our share of problems, but I guess about a year into the relationship, I started noticing that she was 'very' moody all the time and getting to be very difficult to talk to and to just deal with in general. Now throughout her life, she had attended a psychologist for a few years to help her deal with her mother and father getting a divorce so seeing a mental doctor was not a 'huge' issue for her. I suggested she go back to see him cause she was realizing that she was having issues again. After she had been at the Dr's for a few months, I realized that her mood swings and her just being mean to me had increased. I love her so much and tell her that all the time; I do so much for her to show her how much I love her. But she is just so mean to me. I know she doesn't physically mean to be, but she just is and it is pushing me away. I have had 'many' talks with her about this problem, but she will deny on some occasion and on others, she will come right out and admit her problem dealing with her emotions. I have been dealing with this for a while now, and I have actually started to categorize her 'emotions' or what I like to call 'alter egos' The first one is her 'happy side' This is where is totally normal, I can carry on a normal conversation with her and she is totally calm and cool about it. The second one is her 'moderate side' this one usually deals with her mood literal swing in the matter of minutes, from being extremely happy to extremely sad/mad/depressed. I have even gotten as to be able to forecast this emotion and usually can build my self up to deal with it. The third one is the 'rage side' as the name suggest, this one deals with her just blowing up and not being able to control her anger at me any longer. Now one my think these are all normal. But these moods will come out of nowhere. I could literally be sitting down and talking with her about nothing that would upset her, and BOOM there it goes. Something in her mind has happened to change her totally mentality. And if I'm there in front of her, she takes it out on me. Saying things like.' you don't do anything to make me happy', 'you don't love me', 'you never do anything right'. and on and on. The Dr she goes to has her on some meds, but I don't see any difference. I tell her that I do cause I think the mental encouragement actually helps her. All of my friends all tell me how much of a caring and loving guy I am … and most of them tell me to leave her, and her friends/parents love me so much cause they see how much I really do love her. And I do… She isn't like this with anyone else but me. Its like its in my own little world and I'm the only one that knows she is like this. Cause if I were to say something to her friends about all this. She would just prove me wrong, and act normal. I have actually been to a Shrink cause I was staring to think, that maybe it was me. Or maybe I was losing it, but my dr. told me she has a lot of issues that need to be resolved and to not doubt myself. I really don't know if I have a question, maybe I just need some advice. I mean. I want to stay with her cause I love her so much, but I also don't want to be married and have to deal with this my entire life… I sit in the mall or wherever and look at the happy couples and wish all the time that we could just be normal and live a normal life, why does it have to be so difficult. I just want a loving wife that is understanding, caring, and wants to be happy together. I really love life, and I really want someone to love life with me. I hope that I feel this way someday…I'm just tired of being put down all the time and feeling like I am a piece of crap.
