IntegrityGal

this is what i'm having trouble with today... These are his words when we were breaking up............... his hesitations killed the warm fuzzies, which makes it hard to grow. Leaving me hanging like the intent is to clear the problem and then to eventually (after he's ready) get to growing. Now he didn't promise it would be with me, but he was writing it too me. But it's feels like its all up in the air.!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Day 12. This sight is helping me a lot! That's where I am right now. If we could put a scale on the craziness going on in my head, when I signed up I was at 110%, now I've eased up and I'm at like 90% feeling crazy. It's a little less often and a little less exhausting. All of a sudden I realize WHEW! I wasn't obsessing over him the minute that just passed! Hey that was peaceful! I'm focusing on being selfish, gaining control, and getting started with my self-building schedule........ Back to me again... yeay!

This is my first day on eNotAlone and I am glad to find the emphasis on No Contact. We agreed to cut off all communication 11 days ago. Day 7, 8, 9, 10 & 11th have been the hardest. He is so "PC" and is so careful to not lead me on, but has never said anything negative either. Grrrrr, i asked him to say SOMETHING turned him off & that's why we broke it off but he couldn't. He's such a gentleman and mature, but I wish he would have said he never see's us together again. I'm in obsessive/infatuation mode right now.... freaking out!