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deleted-account

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Everything posted by deleted-account

  1. deleted-account
    So I broke all sorts of NC last night by sending a few texts to my ex. I got way to drunk and I've been puking all morning. Oh well, I think I had fun last night.
  2. deleted-account
    Today has been the hardest day emotionally in months. Fighting to get through the holidays
  3. deleted-account
    So I'm no good at this NC thing, although, it's pretty much been 2 months since any real contact with her. So I unblocked her on AIM and within 20 minutes she sent me a message and started making jokes. I haven't responded back yet since I have my away message up. I know I'm not completely healed but I have made huge gains in the past few months. Ultimately I want her back but as far as I know she's still with this other guy. Her interest is definietly high cause she has no idea what I'm doing with my life right now. I think I'm going to see how this goes the next few days and if it's going nowhere then I'll go back to NC. I truly feel that no matter what she says right now that it won't set me back. I'm taking a chance.
  4. deleted-account
    Contacting her today was definitely a mistake. Now I'm busy wondering what she was going to say when she called back. I'm fighting the urge to contact her again.
  5. deleted-account
    I've been struggling with this NC lately. Must be the Holidays. Anyway, it doesn't seem to hurt or upset me when I break NC, but I know it's delaying my healing. I sent her a text today telling her that the Bengals vs steelers is on tonight. She's not a huge football fan but she does/did cheer for the Bengals with me. She immediately tried to call but I didn't pick up. I'm not playing any games, I just know that I probably can't handle actually talking to her on the phone. I don't even know how long it's been since I've heard her voice, probably a couple months. I wish I could figure out what's going on in my head. I don't really want to talk to her because I don't want to hear about how great her life is going, but then I find ways to break NC.
  6. deleted-account
    Haha!! I just realized it's only been 4 months since we broke up, not 5 like I was thinking. For some reason I'm finding this hilarious. I guess it just feels like it's been forever.
  7. deleted-account
    princess_summer_blue84 It would have been better if you didn't do that, but it's not a big deal if you're fine with it. Telling someone that you're moving on can be seen as you not moving on.
  8. deleted-account
    5 months now since we've laughed together and smiled together. I find I'm starting to forget why I fell in love with her. I'm forgeting why I was so happy. I'm forgeting who she is. That's what has me upset right now.
  9. deleted-account
    I screwed up my NC this weekend. Got VERY drunk with some buddies and had a great time. Next morning I looked at my phone and realized I had sent her a text at 5 am. She didn't respond but it doesn't really bother me. Back to NC though.
  10. deleted-account
    So I'm officially joining the challenge. I already did a fake NC for 30 days where I continued to look at her facebook. I thought I was in a good state and contacted her 2 weeks ago and we've had LC since then, but it's still hurting me so I need to go NC. Today I finally deleted her off everything. My story is pretty simliar to what others have gone through. Both 23, together over 3 years. We pretty much lived together the first 2 years but the last year was long distance since she stayed behind to get her masters degree. I had a deposit down on a ring when she broke up with me in July. We talked a lot about marriage and having kids, and she definitely wanted to. We considered ourselves unofficially engaged and I just didn't have the money for a ring yet. There's another guy in the picture so I need to move on even though I still love her.
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