sadmaggie

Thanks, that helps a lot. I really don't want to force anything (which means I don't want to make contact out of desperation). So, it is good to hear that when you're at a peace, contact hopefully won't seem desperate. It is also good to know there is hope.

Thanks for all your responses. I definitely AGREE and want to give him space. My only worry is he is extremely stubborn, and knowing him for as long as I have, I know he won't call even if he wants to in fear it may go straight into a fight. Seeing him in past friendships and with other women, I know after arguments he tends to sometimes wait until that person calls and acts normal. So, I want to be sure to give him his space and time. I am okay with that. I just wish I knew if calling him in two or five weeks is still pushing it. It is hard! Thanks again for the responses.

Believe me when I say I now know the meaning of drinking to your limit. No excuses. I acted ridiculous that night and am genuinely sorry. I am not a person who drinks a lot, I just learned that night it only takes one night of drinking too much to cause damage.

Well, me and the guy I was dating for 8 months (been friends for 13 yrs) got into a huge fight I already wrote about. Let's just say, it was the worst I ever acted and I had WAY too much to drink. We ended up making up, (or so I thought). I spent the night at his house and he was super cuddly. Even when I was leaving, watching me at his door until I left the street. But, I never heard from him since! He just went into NC. His boss came into town that week and I know he had a lot to distract him from thinking about me b/c he had day/night meetings all week. But I am in shock that I haven't heard from him. Before that we talked on the phone nightly, and it was even hard to get him off the phone sometimes. My friends are even shocked. Here is a quick synopsis of contact after the fight: Friday: Fight Saturday: Leave his house at 8:00 p.m., get a call from him around 10 to make sure I was okay. Sunday: NC from either end Monday: I sent an online gift certificate w/ a short apology letter and two funny articles via e-mail. Never hear from him. Tuesday: Call him on my way home. Never hear from him. NC now for five days. So, I am now focusing on myself and trying not to think about it. But when can I contact him? I know he checks my MySpace page a lot, but not sure if that means anything. BTW, I just want us to be okay. I have known him so long, friendship comes before anything. And I am not just saying that.

Wow, still no word. I just remembered that he told me last week his big boss was coming into town and he was going to have lots of late night meetings. I am still in denial that this will be the last time I hear from him. It is so HARD! I hate that this could be his last image of me. I've been good and only called him that one day (Wed). I hate that the weekend is nearing b/c I know we won't hang out. I am super sad I have this awards ceremony for work Saturday, and this puts such a damper on it all! Any advice if and when I should call him again. I found this really cute ecard that says I am sorry, but I don't want to overdo it. But I also don't want to underdo it. I hate the night time b/c that is when we usually talk at least an hour on the phone. Sorry for the sad rant. HELP!

Thanks. It is hard. I still haven't heard from him, so I think I will give him a call either tonight or tomorrow (it's been about three days since we have talked besides my online gift certificate). I want to give him space, but not make it too weird either.

well, i sent him the gift certificate and an e-mail today around 3:00 p.m. and still no word. after 13 years of knowing each other, i hope this isn't how it ends...

One last attempt for advice tonight. I am about to buy the certificate online in an hour or so.

"Here is to steering clear of tequila for a long, long while. I am still in disbelief about Friday and more SORRY about it than I have ever been about anything How is that. There isn't much room to write on the certificate.

One more question: I am giving him a gift certificate to his favorite store online, which allows you to write a note. I just want to apologize one more time and then give him some space to allow him to make a decision. But I want to say the right thing. So, I started to write it and froze. Like I said, even in serious situations he tends to be light and getting too serious makes him withdraw sometimes. So, how do I let him know how SERIOUSly sorry I am, but still make him feel comfortable. Thank you for all the replies! I have already searched to find someone to talk to about my stress and this incident. I am also steering clear of alcohol for awhile (and when I do drink again, sticking to even below what I know I can handle). To be honest, I don't drink that much, so that isn't usually a problem, BUT now I have learned drinking too much is! Thanks again. I know this is by far the WORST thing I have ever done, and I just want to make it as right as I can.

I have always been the put together girl who people come to advice. But I have had more stress and bad things happen to me in the last few months, and it has kind of been hard to handle. It has been one of those times where it just keeps piling up. I do plan on seeing someone, and I am not blaming just the alcohol. I know I did it, and like I said, I am disgusted with that. I will say I wouldn't have ever done it had I not had so much to drink. EVER. I am still in shock it happened at all. I am just surprised I have this pent up anger that I didn't even know about. And even worse, it was directed at my boyfriend. I just hope he can see that isn't who I am. I can't get it out of my head. It is seriously the worst image just stuck there. I can't believe it happened. I really can't.

Thanks for your response. That is what makes me so sick and disgusted at myself, because I would never understand how someone can hit someone (and there is no excuse). I am definitely going to give him his space, and steer clear of alcohol for awhile. I wish there was a way to show him how sorry I am. Unfortunately, when it comes to problems, he is an avoider, so talking to him about it will probably push him away more. I just want him to know how sorry I am. Like I said, after knowing him for 13 years, I would hate for this to be his last image of me. It hurts my heart. I would do anything to turn back time. I will never allow myself to get in such a state again. I am beyond disappointed in myself.

I can't believe this happened! I drank and actually swung at the guy I am dating! I don't even know why! There is a guy I have been dating for 8 months. We have been friends since I was 15 (which is about 13 years now). Unfortunately, are schedules don't mesh. We get along extremely well, but we began reverting back to friends. We have been at one of those strange points where we're not talking as much, and I will admit it is more on his side than mine. So, we ate this Friday and I planned on saying maybe we should back off since we both are so busy with new jobs that make us travel. It actually began as the best night we ever had. We had great conversation and it was really fun. Then we got a call from his cousin who was having friends at his house. He has major cash, and when we got there they had already had three bottles of nice wines. They were drinking a $100 bottle of tequila. So, even though I already had two large margaritas, I did a few shots his cousin made for me, plus two more drinks he made. They began playing pool, and all the sudden I became angry and agitated. They were playing and weren't really letting me play. Then we got in the car. I can't remember details, or how we even began arguing. But somehow things escalated and I swung my arm at him while he was driving. I have NEVER hit anyone in my 28 years. I don't even have violent thoughts or tendencies. I don't know how it even happened. He yelled at me and I did it again, and when he blocked it, I hit my head on his window. We yelled horrible things at eachother and he called me crazy. By the time I got home, it all started to hit me. He told me to get out, and I tried to say I didn't want our last words to be like this. Before I got out, I realized I didn't have my keys. But he kept telling me to get out, so I jumped out. I walked near my house where he couldn't see me and began bawling. He came over about 2 minutes later and hugged me and he put his hands on my face and I apologized and said I didn't even know what happened and how I could have EVER done that. He said it was okay, and we went to his house since I couldn't get in mine. We ended up making up, but it was weird. Needless to say, when we woke up, we were both beyond hung over. I felt so sick and like the worst person ever. And it just hung over our heads. We hugged and talked, but it has just changed everything. I left his house late that night knowing I would probably never hear from him again. I hate that it ended our friendship completely. I hate that I allowed myself to drink so much! Most of all, I can't even believe I hit him! I don't know what to do. It is haunting me! I am such a peaceful, happy person. I hate that in his eyes, I am now what I was in such a bad drunken state. I am just so sorry.