confusedd

Almost 2,5 years...

I don't really understand the reactions on my last post, maybe I didn't really explain myself well. I am not planning to call him anymore, because it will hurt him and myself. I think wanting contact now would be out of denial. I still love him and on one side I would still want him back, on the other I know that our relationship is not possible anymore. We were in a Long Distance Relationship and it was a lot of pain missing each other all the time. During the relationship I always said that love is all that matters, now I dont know anymore. Maybe its not enough. I am very scared though that I will lose him, since he lives in another country. That we would grow apart. I hope I can call him at a later time, when I understand and can live with the idea that it's over. I also hope that he would pick up the phone and talk to me. I understand that its also his right to not pick up.

Thank you all very much for your replies. i really appreciate it!!! I haven't contacted him, it makes me feel stronger about myself. I think if I would contact him it would only be out of denial... I do think that it would be my right to call him, since I still want to tell him what I think about the break up. I never got the chance to let him know, he broke up with me over the phone. A relationship is something between two people, I can respect his wish to not speak to me for three months. But I do hope that there's some respect the other way too. But I understand that now is not the right time to let him now, since I am NOT NOT NOT over him yet. I would probably get angry at him... I liked the: "ONLY contact him if you are prepared to hear ANYTHING, including him telling you all about the great new woman he is getting married to." I think Ill keep telling myself that when I feel the urge to call!!!

My boyfriend broke up with me three weeks ago, we haven't had any contact since. I want to phone him and see how he's doing. Is this a good idea? I want to stay friends even though I don't know if I am ready for that right now. He didn't want any contact for three months he said to me. He is the kind of person who can really keep that going. But I think I am different, isnt it better to have some sort of contact to get over the loss more? I just feel like I am stuck right now. Maybe after I have phoned him I will realize it's to painfull, but something inside me is itching right now.... It is very difficult to go from speaking every day and having a lovely time when you're together to complete, absolute silence...