jonny1234

I was wondering the same - you have lost me antkojm !!!!! What do you mean !!!???

Perfect !!!! Glad to see you are moving on. In a few more months you will be telling yourself how much better off you are with out him. Break the contact and get on with life.

He called me this week. I did not answer the first few times. Then I thought maybe I should answer. He wanted to call at my work, I said no as I was not available to see him. When he insisted, I agreed to meet him else where to avoid a situation. I really did not want him calling at my work. It has been great without him about or calling, however I do miss the goods times we had. So when I met him. He started going off on one, telling me that I should pay some bill for him. I said I could do nothing, and stated the reasons. The situation got heated and he was blocking me leaving until he got an answer. I eventually left, without giving an answer. This guy does not work, he is busy doing his church work, that he has little time to earn a living. A real job would interfer with with his life style. If he is in such a situation, why does he not get a job ? Why does he expect me to bail him out ? After I left, he called me, and hurled insult after insult and basically threatened with saying stuff on me, and just threathening to cause trouble for me with my family. What's with this guy ? We used to be friends and very close. or was it just in my mind ? What does he want from me ? Can things ever be the way they where ? Why does he keep blaming me for everything wrong in his life and with him. Cause we shared a bed, and a massaged him at his request etc etc, this is all my fault he is screwed up ??? How can I resolve stuff with him ? How can we be friends again ? If not how can I keep him away from me, and from damaging my family situation ? Does he have more to lose than me, him being very involved in a church. Everyone says he is gay !!! I have heard from loads of people and people not connected with him. I think he blames me for him being gay, and for having no job as he has so many dis-orders that he says I caused. This is driving me nuts !!! Think somehow I need to be away from him. How ???

take a break, leave it for a while or esle this will drive u mental. Put those thoughts out of your mind. If he wants you, he will ring. But I guess you will do your own thing anyway

Sounds like you need to be brave enough to let go at this time. Put the ball in his court and leave it, until it comes back. Try and leave it !!! Take a break and try to get him out of your head, even a few weeks or a month, and you will feel loads better. But I guess you know your circumstances best

Been there, think am still there, but listen, dont get caught up on him. I know it is difficult to shift those thoughts. I know there is nothing more you want to do than call him, but for your sanity sake you must block the thoughts, and bit by bit you will get there. Does any one know how to successfully get over some-one. Is there a successful way to remove those thoughts and feeling . ? Especially when you want to be with some-one. Any clues ??? But I know this, you have to move on, at this stage regardless, as much as it hurts. You have to remove him from your mind !!! Some how, dont know how !!!

but then he says he is going to tell everyone that I touched him up. Even though this has happened loads, and loads of time, and he let me, never stopped me once. He makes it sounds like I abused him, even though we are in our late 20's. Why would he do a thing, is it is way of explaining him being gay !!! my fault !!!

Thanks Foxlocke. and others !!! It sure is good to have someone to share these problems with. My problem seems to be, I have to work hard that avoiding this guy. I just dont know how to deal with him when I will be confronted by him. I cant really say clear off !!! If I say clear off he gets mad and starts ranting saying stuff he hopes the staff will hear and I cant leave the place cause it is my work place !!!! So if any one has any clues how to keep this guy away, cause he does not take the hint !!! I think he knows without me, he is sdfsijdhfdsifghsej !!! but I dont need him !!!

what do you do, if he does not go away. yesterday was the perfect example, he knows am not speaking to him and trying to stay away, yet he calls into the office and stays saying nothing, he doesnt even work here. Cant he get the hint !!!! I have already said for him not to come calling, I give up !!!

This guy is a devout church goer, and I think being gay would ruin his image. But no matter who I speak , all that know him ,consider him gay. He is just screwed up, but I blame myself as he puts the guilty trips on me, in order to get to me. 1 minute he is fine the next he is mental, and after the mental it is just like it never happened. We fought a few weeks ago, when I refused to give any money, but now he still wants to meet up with me to discuss stuff. I keep refusing. Even after such a strong bust up, he still comes round. Even if I said go , he does not !!! Even if I fought with him and said go, he does not !!! This guy is too busy playing at church, that he does not have time to work. On one hand he is the perfect saint to those in his church, then with me he is a bad one !!!! It is so so confusing. So now I'am just going to try avoid him, dont know how .

I keep thinking is it me ? Am I the problem ? I keep examining the facts, and without bias and I think we are both screwed up !!!! I keep being told I have screwed his life up because I touched him up !!! But this has happened many, many times, and he let me and still does. Even the other evening he was looking for me to start, by asking me to massage his back. What straight male would even ask another male to do this, and allow me share his bed. He asks me about money, because of a business partnership, the business is not doing too well, and he has earned no money from it and thereforeeee expects me to help. I have done under duress, and when I say no, he gets very threatening. Then he throws up all the stuff he says I have done to him to make it sound like abuse. I want to help, but how can I when one minute everything is great and we are sharing a bed, next minute am accused of abusing him. I give up !!! Is he gay or have I made him gay, or maybe he is just a confused straight guy ??? He seeks money because he says I owe him

I have a friend that I have known for 20 + years. I have shared a bed with him on many occasions, and have touched him sexually. He has never objected. He tells me he is not gay, but has never had sex, and only tells me he does not like the thought of sex with a girl. He wants to get married. but he from time to time gets extremely angry with me, and then he brings up all the stuff that happens between us. ( Only when it comes to looking money of me ). Is he using me ??? I have resisted all request for money, then he gets mad, and tells me of all the bad things I have done on him. But then he turns up, asks me to massage his back, and feet and allows me to touch him. What is he up to ?