Arty Fella

well this morning i send her a text and was a lil more confident ... we both couldnt decide what to do so i took charge and said well ill come over soon and we can just go from there. Spent another nice 6/7 hours with her driving around and taking pics and stuff ... i am a photographer and she seems keen to learn so we just drove around taking pics laughing and chatting. We then got some kfc and went to the park and fed the ducks and then went to her house for a while and just chilled out. And it did turn out that she was busy when i think she wernt responding lol She is such a cool chic ... just a lil crazy and shy like me. I tried to look at the whole day as just friendly... but i wasnt shure if maybe she might be changing mind now that we know each other better now. It was just lil things that sorta stumped me ... and there has been a lil bit off light flirting from her aswell. Maybe she was just testing me since i seem to be just friendly now lol tomorrow is xmas and she will be coming over at 3 or 4 pm and staying until 2am in the morn when she will catch the train. She muttered as i left tonight something about santa might visit me if im good lol. So well see how the night eventuates. Feel so better to read the good advice here and to just enjoy the company of a really cool person. I better go sleep now big day tomorrow ... thanks all merry xmas

Diggity i hear what ya saying and as id hate to admit it ya probally right ... i read ya thing a few weeks ago and ive done that too many times to mention lol. Well ill probally type my big tale of woah later I had been messaging this girl this afternoon ... and i said in one message "i was going to c if ya wanted to maybe come over here this arvo or 2 morrow" and no reply came (yeah i know shock horror) So i sent one back saying " i hope i didnt freak ya out by asking if ya wantyed to come over ... maybe we could do something 2 morrow??" she replied what ya thinking. i am now finally sensing she wasnt so keen to come over lol so i reply i dunno just hanging out stuff ... ill have to think. So yeah with what ya said diggity fresh inmind id say ya might be right. I do wear the old heart on my sleave way too much. And yeah she has been keen to hang out before but thats mainly because i stop her being bored on her own ..., but she just brought a new book so she will be fine lol And i do see that she is liking me just as a friend. And i would be a lil silly to think yet again that by getting to know each other them things might change. Dang im now in a really tricky spot that ive been in a few times ... seems like i dont learn to fast The big thing for me now is i dunno wether to just cut all ties and move on (done that before) but to me that is an easy way out.... i sorta like to think i could somehow remain friends with her and just loose any of these strong feeling i have for her. I really wanna do this one smart... this girl is the best so far and thereforeeee might be the hardest fall. The thing is i wanna avoid that fall if i can help it. I guess with each time i do this silly stuff i slowly learn a lil and the fall isnt so hard to bear but gee id rather not go through the crap again. I wish i had a forum place like this many years ago lol maybe i wouldnt be going through this stuff now I have a lot to learn it seems ... any links lol And shy thanks too man i always do what the heart says and it usually gets me into trouble. ------------------- After a pause and contemplation i think id like to try and continue on as friends and just enjoy the company ..... i just gotta not get so hung up on her and accept the facts somehow.... and not be too keen on xmas kisses and gotta get used to the fact that soon she will be gone for good. hmmm

well after debating all day on wether i would send her a message or not i finally plucked up the courage and sent her a message. and she replied lol And i went over and picked her up and we went looking at guitars and stuff.. and then we drove around looking at xmas lights before going back to her house and chilled out a lil. It was a really cool night and it was like most things were settled on the first outing we had. I heeded the good advice here and played it cool and enjoyed her company and didnt push or even mention any relationship stuff. She was happy to see me and thanked me for coming over which i took as a nice friendly thing. She wont be going back for xmas so i am trying to plan a nice day for her... and she will probally be staying for a lil while xmas night so she can catch the train from here at 2am... i just gotta stay cool and not be too overly keen for any stuff on xmas if she isnt ready. I think i will try and spend as much time with her as i can while she is down this way and see what happens. Who knows the novelty may even wear off but im not thinking so. Time seems to get lost somewhere when we chat lol. One thing a mate told me today might also be some good advice..... He said " don't be at her beck and call. let her miss you a little bit now and then" i think he was meaning dont be the doormat i gotta do my won stuff too and not be too hung up on her something like that. And yeah shysoul i guess with her saying that maybe she thought we would just be friends maybe was the bit that had me thinking im in the zone lol And this other guy seemed to fade away pretty quickly... not shure if i had a hand in that But yeah she is shy and maybe like me always freaking about stuff if a relationship is close at hand.... sometimes its easier to run but running keeps ya alone is my new motto lol. Thanks for the great advice and stuff everyone ill keep yas posted

Hi all my first post on here. Ive had my eye on this girl i was working with during some seansonal work. From the first moment i met her i thought she was pretty special... quite easy on the eye and a good laugh and a fun person to be around. I read the posts here a coupla weeks ago aabout people falling into the dreded friend zone .... and i think i just fell into that zone myself I couldnt pluck up the courage to ask this girl out at work (mainly because i once asked another chic i worked with out and it didnt go so well so i didnt wanna be trapped again|), but i spent most lunchtimes and morning and afternoon breaks getting to know this girl. It was apparent from the start that she has a fair share of shyness... maybe even more shy than me in a way... and she told me she was picked on in school ... from being shy and stuff... so i didnt wanna push things too far with this girl. She is great to be around and at work we would sing together and muck around and make each other laugh .... she once said she had a cold nose and needed a nose beanie lol thta really cr5acked me up i guess because i have a similar wacky sense of humour. during morning tea on our last day of work i gave her a nose beanie that i had got made.....she loved it And later that day as she was about to go we exchange numbers and i finally asked her out on a lunch date.... me telling her "just lunch" (i guess i could sorta sense she was still unshure) So yeah a coupla days ago we went out for lunch. I was really nervous because i guess i was thinking of it too much of a first date and i had butterflys in my stomach all morning. We went and had some lunch which was really nice and then had a drink or 2 and we chatted for a while before starting the walk back to the cars. We sat for a while on a chair in the main street and then she told me that she wasnt really looking for a realionship as she sorta had a guy back home and she didnt think thta would change anytime in the near future. She said incase thats what you were thinking. I was a lil shocked... but i guess she had to tell me because i had hinted to things during our lunch chat and she probally thought it best to set me straight. I dont know if she was testing my true feelings or not but after that i couldnt hide them. I mumbled that well id be lying if i didnt say i liked ya... but i realise i might not be your cup of tea. I think i also said damn a few times lol. but tried to keep fairly upbeat. The whole day coulda ended there, and iu woulda went home to sulk for a day or 2 lol but she then said lets go for a drive. So we went in her car and did some sight seeing and then went and got osme icecreams and went to the park to lay on the grass and chat for ages. Turns out that like me she has never had a real love.... she decided to give up on it and had a one night stand and decided that that was fun and then does it some more now. Turns out her guy that she has is just some off again on again thing .... she said she has feelings for him after he comes and sees her for sex ... but he dosent really respond .. never rings or messages her or other caring stuff like that. I felt sorta sad for her to hear she was in such a prediciment wit a guy who doesnt appreciate her. Anyway we chatted all up for 6 hours that day ... i probally opened my mouth too much and said * * * * i didnt even mean i maybe tried to make out i was as shy as her to somehow have a connection blah blah. But there was some definent fun times there and i kinda hoped she could see what a realtionship with me would be like..... we laughed and giggled like kids and threw clumps of grass at each other and we swung together on the swings and i pushed her on the swings for a while too I think the main thing she dont like about me is that im a lil rough around the edges... and im a lil overweight (probally the main thing) , but i thing she realised that we could be good friends at the least. She said i brought out the funside in her. So yeah im at a loss as to what to do. Part of me says i still maybe have a chance with her if i was less clingy and more confident i could serenade her and win the girl! Another part says gee i should just give up now and stop this * * * * lol Another says well maybe ill just be her happy doormat and be friends with her and maybe in the future who knows. She lives a fair distance away from me and has just been back here doing seasonal work and she is soon leaving for 2 weeks to go home for christmas (she is still undecided if she will go back???) And then she will work for another month back here until she leaves tio restart uni in feburary. I guess i just wanna spend as much time with her whilst she is down this way and see what happens. She did ask me hypothetically what would i do with us if she was up there .. i said i would considering moving to where she was ... and i didnt get to finish my line before the freak alarm bells rang in her head and she mentioned the well i dont think id really like the clingy and not being able to go out blah blah. I did mean to say well id consider it in the future bit lol Dang ive been laying around mopping for 2 days and am just starting to feel a lil better about it. Her last day of work before shristmas was yesterday so im kinda keen to meet her again tonight maybe see what happens. Dang i think sometimes i should just crawl back into my cave and hide like a hermit!!!!!!!!! Safer that way ... lonely but safe