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MsAin1st

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  1. Yes, Wiseman. It’s him. We’ve been very slowly getting to know each other. That was the first time we’ve seen each other somewhere not public or without mutual friends present. We've only talked on the phone or texted since Wednesday night because he works weekend night shifts, but you’re right, he was so gentle with what he said. Guess I’m silly to be worried. I like him a lot and don’t want to mess things up. I was 18 when I met Frank, so this will basically be my first real “adult” relationship. Honestly, it’s kind of scary! I just want it to go well. Thanks 😊
  2. Last night the guy I’ve been getting to know invited me over to hang at his house to watch a Halloween movie. We were sitting together and I snuggled into him and fell asleep (embarrassing part #1). He woke me up when the movie was over and I said “Oh God Frank, I’m sorry I fell asleep!” So embarrassing part #2 is I called him the wrong name. I felt crappy as soon as it happened and apologized, but he brushed it off and was like “well that’ll probably happen every now and again.” I am super embarrassed by these things. I don’t want him to feel like I was bored… in fact I was just comfortable and felt really relaxed with him. And secondly, do I need to say anything about calling him the wrong name or just let it go?
  3. Losing a pet just flat out sucks. When you’re ready, call some vets and see if you can find one that does home euthanasia. You and Kitty can be comfortable in your own space as you say goodbye. Letting a pet cross the rainbow bridge is a true act of love. 💜
  4. Time to call a family meeting and outline some new expectations. It would be good to have a “contract” typed up that she can agree to and sign. If she doesn’t want to, then she can move along. She’s an adult and needs to be treated like one. My parents gave us the choice to live at home during college or to move out. If we chose to live at home we were expected to help with the house chores and have a part time job. They didn’t charge us rent but we had to be actively putting money into a savings account. We also had to follow basic house rules and give an approximate time we’d be returning from an evening out (that helped cut down on the worrying).
  5. I’m big into calendaring and planning. I do this weekly. Since I teach but am also a grad student, I outline what I MUST accomplish for each during the week and on what day I want to do it. I also factor in my home tasks (laundry, cleaning, etc). I do 1 major chore per day and laundry a couple times a week. After I’ve done all this I can see what free time/me time I have left and know when I can meet up with friends. I’m a visual person so having things laid out in a planner helps me keep it all balanced.
  6. So if he can’t follow the fwb arrangement you agreed to, stop seeing him. It seems like 1 person developing feelings in a fwb relationship is a common thing.
  7. Husband needs to take a turn getting baby ready to go out for an outing as well as getting himself ready. He will see that it isn’t an easy or quick task.
  8. It will only be awkward if you let it! Go have a magical night!!!
  9. Update: Met up with M for a long run this morning. I told him that I am conflicted and not sure that I am ready for dating or a relationship. I told him I want to take things slowly & before he could agree with it, I need him to take a bit and consider what that could mean. I don’t want to string him along if he wants more than I can give right now & I don’t want to be pressured into things I’m not ready for yet. He told me he understood and would think carefully about it all. Also, scheduled a counseling session for Tuesday. Thanks for urging me to get back to that. O
  10. Do your parents object to you going to homecoming with him? If not… Go to the dances with him and have fun!
  11. Thank you Lost & Sherry. I will definitely be honest with him about my feelings. The last thing I want is for anyone to feel any kind of hurt or pain because of me. I surmise that he he already knows how I feel, but I agree it’s best to be up front with him. He texted me a bit ago to ask if I’d like to meet up with him in the morning for a run.
  12. Yeah, it’s probably not the best plan to get involved with anyone now. But it felt so damn good to hold someone’s hand.
  13. I had been in grief counseling but stopped going in June. I needed a break from most of my commitments for the summer— after Frank, a truly taxing school year and also being a grad student, I just needed time to just be. I also had to move because I could no longer afford rent by myself. Resuming counseling is a smart plan. What do you mean by investing in myself? I see my friends regularly, have hobbies, a career, and am a grad student as well.
  14. Well last night I felt terrible, and no it wasn’t too much rum. I laid in my bed and bawled for at least a couple of hours. I mean, I suppose I should have expected that. As hard as I try to keep them in check, my emotions are all over the place. Not sure how to process grieving over one man but feeling happy when another sends me a text.
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