LovesCoffee

Thank you so much for your adivce guys it really helped me out as i continued to think about what i want for myself in the future and what I want to find in another person. realizing that i still need to grow emotionally etc, is definetly something i needed to consider. I will let him know how I'm feeling and it might be difficult at first, but we'll both move on and find someone else and i could even have fun dating along the way to meeting the right person for me. Thanks again it means alot!

Thank you so much for your advice. I continued to think about what I want in a relationship and what I want for myself and for my future. realizing that I'm still growing as a person if definetly something that needs to take priority in my situation. I will tell him how I'm feeling and it might be hurtful in the beginning, but we will move on i'm sure, and both he and I will find someone who is more suited for us and maybe i'll just have some fun dating along the way. Thanks again, you've really helped me out and assured me guys!

I' ve never wanted advice so much in my life; mainly becuase this is my first real, long relationship. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and he is my first love. when he says 'first love' he means 'only love'. he's in it for the long run and I thought I was too, until I started thinking about being with other people. What would it be like? can i be with one person forever especially when i've never been with anyone else and I'm only 18? I have felt like I have had better emotional and intellectual connections with other guys than with him. He loves me so much and I love him too, but I think about all of the things we don't have in common. We go to separate colleges and we made it through the first year with our long distance relationship becuase he came home often enough, but it was hard. We had a hard time communicating and often times he was distracted with the dorm life and when we did devote the attention to ourselves we had nothing to say except "how was your day". He is now home for the summer and we're both working and probably won't see each other more than once a week. I think I want to see other people and the things that I look for in a person are not what he is. I love the city and want to live there, and he hates it. We have different views on how to live our lives or raise our children when we do get to the point of starting a family after college. He's so laid back and nothing affects him, whereas I am always acute to the things around me and react to them. I want to be with someone adventurous who could care less about money, and he wants to have a job where he makes $$ even if he is unhappy and its not his dream. If we did take a break or actually break up and he found someone else, I would be really hurt and completely jelous, and I also feel that we wouldn't be able to remain friends. Is it horrible that I am willing to take that chance? I don't know how to make him understand how I feel and that I still love him. I'm so confused. He is the greatest guy and I feel so lucky, but something is missing. how on earth do I do this? Do i see how it goes for the summer, or let him know what I'm thinking, but how can i do that without completely crushing his heart? Please help. any advice would be so welcome, thanks much. Lesley

I' ve never wanted advice so much in my life; mainly becuase this is my first real, long relationship. I've been with my boyfriend for a year and a half and he is my first love. when he says 'first love' he means 'only love'. he's in it for the long run and I thought I was too, until I started thinking about being with other people. What would it be like? can i be with one person forever especially when i've never been with anyone else and I'm only 18? I have felt like I have had better emotional and intellectual connections with other guys than with him. He loves me so much and I love him too, but I think about all of the things we don't have in common. We go to separate colleges and we made it through the first year with our long distance relationship becuase he came home often enough, but it was hard. We had a hard time communicating and often times he was distracted with the dorm life and when we did devote the attention to ourselves we had nothing to say except "how was your day". He is now home for the summer and we're both working and probably won't see each other more than once a week. I think I want to see other people and the things that I look for in a person are not what he is. I love the city and want to live there, and he hates it. We have different views on how to live our lives or raise our children when we do get to the point of starting a family after college. He's so laid back and nothing affects him, whereas I am always acute to the things around me and react to them. I want to be with someone adventurous who could care less about money, and he wants to have a job where he makes $$ even if he is unhappy and its not his dream. If we did take a break or actually break up and he found someone else, I would be really hurt and completely jelous, and I also feel that we wouldn't be able to remain friends. Is it horrible that I am willing to take that chance? I don't know how to make him understand how I feel and that I still love him. I'm so confused. He is the greatest guy and I feel so lucky, but something is missing. how on earth do I do this? Do i see how it goes for the summer, or let him know what I'm thinking, but how can i do that without completely crushing his heart? Please help. any advice would be so welcome, thanks much. Lesley