n2country

Day 3 - Day 5 since the break up and from when we last had any kind of communication. Well made it through the work week... I've lost 9.8lbs, can't eat...can't sleep... The weekend is going to suck without work to keep me distracted but I am filling my time with activities and getting TF out of the house. Going to an all day birthday party one town over with some friends so I will be meeting new people... Cause I really don't know what to do with all my free time.. Made a list of why we can't be friends as suggested and a list of why we didn't work out in my journal will keep rereading them daily till I don't need to anymore. My Feelings: Bounce from Sad to Meh

Day 2 - Day 4 since the break up and from when we last had any kind of communication. I'm on a roller coaster ride of emotions to be honest. I don't care how bad this hurts, I refuse to reach out to her again. When we broke up now for a 2nd time in 3 months after almost a year relationship I didn't make the same errors as the first time. I didn't reason, beg, grovel, there were some non overly dramatic tears on each side and we held each other. We both know it was over. I absolutely REFUSE to reach out to her and sacrifice another drop of my dignity for someone who doesn't deserve it. I started working on me after the first break up so I am continuing on that path, Gym, eating right, Therapist, and practicing self care. I miss her terribly... but I'll be ok.. I know I will. She hasn't reached out and quite frankly I'm a little nervous for the day comes that she will..

She's not going to Change... However I didn't see anything in the Rules about Blocking or deleting anyone's number. I did see not going to their Snap, IG, or FB and such but nothing about all out blocking them? Which is why I asked.. I also didn't read all 20k pages in this thread

First day of no contact, challenge accepted - I say First Day because I have been looking at FB, Instagram, & Snapchat... My Feelings: This is the second time she dumped me after a nightmarish breakup in Sept (My Fault) we got back together (kinda) for another 2 months since she dropped the hammer again... but she never came back really. So after bending over backwards like the spineless jellyfish I am for 2 months getting scraps of intimacy and used for and companionship when it was convenient for her I'm a bit salty... NOW that being said I still love her dearly and I'm just heartbroken. However I know she's not right for me. When you put someone on a pedestal and look at them through rose colored glasses all the red flags just look like flags.. Hell this second time around I saw the flags and I'm a pleaser and thought I could fix it, nope I couldn't.. I'm sad, a little salty, sick and tired about being sick and tired and optimistic about finding love again... Not Now but for once I'm not gonna rebound or Monkey Branch.. I deserve better man.. I really really do. However in my heart of hearts, if she came back and said and did the right things I'd take her back... but I don't want to because if nothing changes and no one WANTS to work on themselves and the relationship well there is nothing I can do... I'm a hot mess. What happens if THEY comment on your FB, SnapChat, or Instagram? Obviously don't respond? I'd like the communities thoughts? My feelings: Las contact, Sunday 1/26/2020