Pink_Elephants

Thankyou so much for your reply guys, yeah well i havent spoken to him on da fone since december, so its usually thru msn or email that we kinda 'catch up' - i actually spoke to him last nite via msn after i posted on here, whenever we talk im my usual happy vibey self and hes always interested in whats happening in my life, he even asked me if i was seeing anyone...i dunno some days i feel like 'im so over this' and other days i feel like 'hes my soulmate' maybe i need a counsellor!!! *laffs* Dating? man i so cant be bothered, i went to 2 parties last wk and there was a severe lack of quality there...my friend says ive turned into those super fussy bishes and that im sabotaging myself to getting close to anyone because i feel i still have unfinished business with the ex...shes prolly rite but i mean is that so wrong? how unfair would it be to sum poor guy if he really fell for me and i still had issues? emotional constipation my friend calls it Sumtimes i think if a relationship has to be so much work, then maybe its just not meant to be?....but then again nothing in life is easy so what makes us think love is? Someone once told me that if you can still forgive each other and love each other through all the heartache, betrayals, obstacles and reunite in honest love...then thats somthing speshal...i just hope that one day...that somthing speshal happens for me and this man whose big brown eyes has penetrated my soul so much... In the meantime, im focussing on my career, thats the only thing im sure of at the moment. thanks for listening and replying

okay so im sure ALOT of you have been here before...he breaks up with you...u cry (and i mean CRY) for months...u start feelin eh! what a jerk ure are SOO TOO good for him...but then valentines day comes and goes and ure sitting there looking at that one perfect picture u have together and althou u promised ureself u would NO MORE waste precious tears on him..u find ure eyes welling up....here is my dilemma... I KNOW i shuld move on and forget about him, i mean we broke up cos we collapsed under the stress of a long distance relationship , althou i think thats just a lame xcuse and im still confused as to why he broke it off...it all started when i said i was thinking of moving to his city, he then went on to tell me that it was a bad idea and hed feel horrible if i moved there just for him cos he knew i had big career plans and didnt want to stuff things up for me...hmmm i still think thats another dodgy excuse and i was really hurt by his response...anyways it was all down hill from there - he broke up with me but even so...3 months later he was still tellin me 'i love u' ...and how hes scared he made a mistake...i tried to get back with him but its so hard when ure not there infront of each other looking into his eyes...he said 'not like this...' so i stopped trying...even thou i still loved and LOVE him so much....i dunno maybe im just kidding myself...its been 6 months now and hes got a new g/f who lives in his home town....he said shes nice, but he hasnt clicked with her the way he did with me and that hes just taking it as it comes...recently he told me that hes never felt with anyone what he felt with me and thats sumthing he wont ever forget....i hate when guys say ish like that, i mean *grrrr* why do u guys do that?!! is it so u can keep us hanging in case u wanna hook up again? men suck sumtimes....in any case...i still miss him...and it pisses me off that i still love him...this is the first time ive ever fallen in love u know...he was speshal.... im thinking of going to see him in da flesh...in a months time...what do u think? my friends think i shuld forget his ass as he didnt appreciate what he had....maybe they are right....BUT i just cant seem to get him out of me....maybe i need closure?....i know life and love goes on but its taking its SWEET TIME!!!! i just want to stop feeling so torn...any thoughts from peeps who have been in this situation or who have views are welcome thanks 4 listening - my diary is prolly thankful for the break May the river of your soul meet the ocean of your dreams.... Miss S