bots10
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Well here we go again. No contact went down the drain the past month or so. Sent her a text just being real and honest about everything and told her I was going to try my best not to contact her because I know it's weird with her living with this new guy. So here goes nothing..
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No contact has gone down the tubes, I essentially gave up. She moved in with the guy she cheated on me with. (3 months post break up after 5 years). She texted me in regards to financial crap between us. I'm done trying, done caring, there is no point of worrying about no contact because truthfully after 3 months whenever she has contacted me has been cold and never wondered how I was.. Etc. Over it. Not even sure I would want her back even if she came back. She ruined my life.
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"You're a ing scumbag! Change the door knob so I can't get in to get my stuff. I have to get my laptop for school and my stethoscope and you had to change the ing locks. Good for you." Text I got this mornin from her. Of course I changed the locks. You chested. Left me. Moved out and haven't talked to me in months.. I'm suppose to just relax knowing you have a key and already moved in with someone else. no. Like you don't live here any more. Your not coming and going as you please.. Lol. This is what you wanted. This is what you got.
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On my 2nd NC stint I got to day 22, then just lost it. The next day she texted me back. Thanked me for the Starbucks gift card I sent her via email, but she told me I need to stop buying things for her and she was dropping my vehicle from the car insurance. I made damn sure she was not going to screw me over again. Our agreement was I pay rent, but she pays the car insurance until her name is off the lease. We argued about it but eventually she agreed to put it back on. This was the most conversation (text) we have had since she left 3 months ago. While talking I attempted to let her how I felt, sent her a picture of myself 70 pounds lighter and asked her if she could answer a couple questions, she said yes. I asked her if she still thought about me and if she reads my texts I send. She said I do cross her mind and she does think about me and she does read my texts, but does not save them. She also said she for the necklaces I sent her, but she does not wear them. That was the last thing she said, other then a few texts about the car insurance a couple nights ago. This morning I texted her and very simply said I had a dream about her last night, and I really miss her. That was is. Think I'm going back to no contact again. Just so crappy. After being eachothers everything for 5 years, now I'm like a stranger. She also moved in with the guy she cheated on me with. 3 months..... After living with me for 4. 5 years. Crazy to me.
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Broke down today.. Texted her. I knew she was in Florida with her family and away from him. Sent one big text as well as an egift card for Starbucks. I know she's going back to school for her last semester and her obsession with coffee is severe..lol. Of course no response. Wasn't expecting one but it makes me feel better I was able to get some off my chest. Oh well.. 22 days I went.. Ugh.
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Great response, I needed to wake up to this. She actually blocked me on Facebook, as well as the rest of my family and the only way she could really find out what I'm doing is via instagram. So of course I use that the most now, posting pictures of me hiking and enjoying things I could never finish with her. Trying to make it seem like I'm doing great for myself.
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That's what it seems like. She's making it seem like shes so much better off. Yet I know where she's living now and the fact that she's living with this guy and her family still has never met him is the funny part. She's embarrassed by him, or at least I think. Her family wouldn't approve. Oh well. It's just annoying. She cheated and left, yet I get ignored like I did something wrong.
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Day 20 of NC (for the 2nd time). Went to a wedding yesterday, took me everything I had no go text her. Looked st her instagram for the first time today in like 3 weeks, she made some comments about "people have never seen me this happy, I'm so free". Hurt me inside, alot. Especially because it was said in response to a comment thst a mutual friend said about the way she looked. I'm still over here wishing for reconciliation, and she's claiming how happy and free she is... Great.
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Very similar situation. Left her with a message like that after the first 30 days. Now day 18 (?) into no contact for the 2nd time. I drove past the trailer trash (literally) place she is living. It's sad.
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Yea I want her back... She cheated on me with a guy 20 years older then her... Polar opposite of me.. He's trash but I think she moved in with him already. Not sure what's going on but maybe she will miss me. I mesn we were together 5 years.
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I did 30..sent her some messages. No response so I'm on my 2nd 30 now.
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Day 13 of my 2nd 30 NC. Still not a peep from her. Last "conversation" was July 3rd. Wondering if she even thinks about me at all? Last 2 days have been really rough. Really miss her, or maybe not her but just having someone. All these different girls contact me but yet none of them are her. It's going to take a very special girl to fill those shoes she left behind. Oh and for those wondering, 4.5 years, she cheated and left.
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I know. Maybe 1 day I will get a text and when that happens I'll be right here letting everyone know. Meanwhile I'm under 200 pounds for the first time in 6 years so as I said. Keep pushing forward.
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Day 10 now o fb my 2nd 30 day stint. Found out on day 4 she was moving in with the guy she cheated on me with. So wanting to talk to her has been a non factor, I'm finally mad. I still do have sad days when I have nothing to do and just want that person go come home too. There 2.5 months into there relationship, I'm waiting for it to blow up. Oh well, keep pushing forward.
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Definitely a changing moment in this whole thing. First time since this all happened ice been able to eat alot.. 6th day of no contact down with out a hitch.
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Yea I'm trying. Don't get me wrong I miss her. But now that thought of "she is able to go right to him after all our time together" keeps popping up. That's enough to make you really feel pissed.
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Today was day 4 of my 2nd stint of NC for 30 days, and I believe I had a breakthrough. My ex has been gone 2 months now, after cheating on me after 5 years. She was getting mail at our place still and today I decide to open a piece.. Not sure what made me do it... But it was a change of address and she is moving in with this guy she cheated on me with. This 43 year old, 20 years older then her, 4 time arrested for selling herion guy. That was all it took. I packed up the rest of her crap , changed the locks and blocked her number. She is now dead to me. I'm better then that. She had a successful life with me, I never treated her wrong and I refuse to be associated with someone like that. Done. Bigger and better things await.
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Day 2 now after contacting her after 30 days no contact. She didn't respond anyways and just made that rejection feel that must worse. She has been posting photos on Instagram saying "young and free".. Crap like that and she's still messing around with this guy who is 20 years older then her, oh and has been arrested 4 times for selling herion. Feels like almost 5 years wasted....anyone wanna buy an engagement ring..
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Well day 1 is almost at an end.. She did not block me or change her number, she just flat out ignored me yesterday. Don't get it. After so many years together, and after her cheating and leaving me... She's the one that won't respond to me.. Isn't this suppose to be reversed.
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Polaris, thanks for the response.... It was like a mudslide today..i sent that first message and then it all spewed out of me. I sent a total of 5, the last essentially saying sorry for blowing you up today, if and when you want to talk I'll he here. This was after I told her I still loved her, and there were no other girls and just me trying to better myself.. Etc. I guess we start over tomorrow at day 1. This is really quite horrible. 2 months and I still can't shake this feeling, and the worst part is I'm not even mad at her.
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I know people say there is no hope. I know someplace there's some truth behind it. My only reason for hanging onto something is the fact that she still is financialy intertwined with myself and has had no concern is trying to separate stuff yet. She also still has a bunch of stuff at the house still.. Idk. Maybe I'm looking too much into it.
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I broke down this morning and texted her... She has not contacted me once since she left. Couple times she would answer my messages with cold 1 word responses. I'm trying to find light at the end of the tunnel but nothing is there. I compare everything and one to her. I said. "Hey" name". Thinking about you and wanted to make it clear, I'm not "ignoring" you or mad at you. I'm just giving you what you wanted. Hope all is well and of course I miss you and still care, alot at that. I'm pretty hurt, won't lie. Still can't believe this happened to "us" of all people. I hope you at least realized over our time together I'm not someone who plays games, I try to be as real as it gets. I don't expect a response, it's ok. Thanks again for everything, I appreciate it more then you know. "
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Well today is 30 days and 2 months since she cheated and left. In those 2 months she has not been social with me at all,sftee almost 5 years. I still want her back, but I know she's still messing around with the guy she cheated on me with originally. I just feel like after everything we have been through she forget about me.. hurts so much. Wish i could could forget about her, not so easy.
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Day 28. They say your suppose to get stronger as the days go on... Still waiting for that to start. 4.5 years. Lived together for 4 years. She cheated on left 2 months ago. No contact from her. I did the begging and pleading thing for the first month and now trying this. I want nothing more then for her to know I have not forgot about her... Yet it seems as though she could care less that I'm even breathing.