Day 4 of NC...My girlfriend and I were seeing each other for almost year. I am her first real boyfriend and we are about to graduate college in a month yet neither one of us will be moving away for another year. The breakup was very emotional for us both as I didn’t see it coming. She said she is having doubt and is not 100% in it right now. She is freaking out about graduating/leaving her friends which may have something to do with it. Her sister told me drunkenly two weeks before the breakup that my ex thinks I may be the “one”. My ex and I talked over coffee a 5 days ago for 2 hours. The conversation went very well. It was the deepest conversation we have ever had yet she still doesn’t want to start anything up right now. We went over what went wrong and what could be different in a future relationship. She said I did not put in enough effort to have a relationship with her friends which is important to her. I was always willing to do what she wanted to do and not say “No I think we should do this”, rather than myself coming up with something fun and adventurous to do.We both agreed that if we would have communicated better in the relationship like we did over coffee then we may still be together. Talking about a possible future relationship makes it sound like Im waiting on her. I don’t want to wait on her but I don’t want to lose her. Looking back on that conversation today I think she was trying to make herself feel better by putting all the blame on me. I admitted to mistakes, praised her for how good of a person, but said if she ever wants to come back it may be too late. The beginning of the day was very hard but towards the end I started feeling really good. Like I didn't need her and this whole breakup is essentially her loss. I don't know if I truly think she'll come back within the next couple months or if its false hope. Right now I don't think I am going to contact even after the 30 days unless she makes an attempt to contact to me. Hopefully tomorrow goes well...
