This is a nice idea thanks. I would like to and not really, I'm confused... However I did go through something very similar to this 1 year and 4 ( or 6) months ago, I do remember most if not all of how I felt and what I went through.
For 2 months my BF had to go to another state for family business we went through something had an argument so we only talked on the phone once a week for a few (oh and the called me and the kids were excited to hear from him sometimes he was too but mostly sounded sad and worry, I'd even had to ask him for advice about the car. Was even excited when we'd see his family or friends and they'd say how he was) minutes probably two weeks. (We have kids together) I've been distant acting like a sister or friends for a while and he hates that, long story. Our oldest son will be graduating in a few months so I don't want to participate also I want to see if I can repair the relationship.
Probably first week was- all kinds of emotionally stressful,
2nd week was- I can do this we'll be ok it's temporary. Maybe I can see/feel what it would be like if we broke it off, maybe I could be me or how it would feel if I hadn't meet him, or see how we/I feel later from without any connection with him, or re start my life over or restart us over or to make myself feel like the stress and unhappiness had been lifted, to encourage me to move on, would I feel free or any different.
It did began to feel good some how. Probably cause I just had went and bought a lot of new clothes for the coming season. Going on with everyday life seem ok, good although I did think of him sometimes and everyone did mention him from time to time.
Week 3 or 4- was getting hard! Soo worried about things braking how would I be able to repair things I cant do much, what if it needed major repairs the house or car who do I turned to what if I didn't have money where would I get that money from, who could I trust. I did get my cars yearly inspection before I found out it needed work I thought should I trust him what if it's very expensive, would I have to leave my car home for months. We did try to fix one small house repair. Don't want to have my oldest thinking he'd have to be a man of the house. Then thinking what about Christmas we don't have enough money for that probably by then I'd have none, what if I cant pick the kids up from school if my boss leaves the business for a few hours I can't leave the place unattended and unlocked what would I do. Then thought if he'd ever disappear the house is in his name what if God forbid..!omg, then thought about the kids... So much more...I'd started to cry a lot and couldn't sleep much.
Week 4 or 5- crying a lot talking about him and us all, so scared about everything and missing him, cuddles, his smell, his touch, his warmth, his voice, his looks, kisses, sex, attention. Even the fatty fast food week end breakfest even that candy bar he think I still love that was for one day craving while pregnant, missing the thoughtful gifts even often ones id thought I was tiered of, missing his imperfections now they became perfect, even missed him being very busy working, compelling, all the little things now didn't seem so bad. I'd cry every time I was alone. Also wondering how is he, what's he doing is he ok how's his family,
Week 5 or 6- probably began thinking of our past all the good times and bad times I really missed those good times a lot I really felt it, it brought back feelings and memories it made me cry a lot and hurt too. I felt sorry for our old younger selfs (about the bad times) and some other feelings I can't remember now. Even missed them. Everytime I'd drive alone I'd cry a lot I should had pulled over. I couldn't stand it anymore. I even cried at home more often in front of everyone, kids said it'll be ok he's coming back soon, me and mom thought if he wanted to take off he could've done it since I drive him crazy soo much but he kept saying he wouldn't.
So this went on a little longer.
When we talked on the phone again we sounded excited we kept repeating everything. When I went to pick him up you'd think it would had been like the movies, it wasn't. But I was soo happy I just wanted him home and quickly. We did hug quickly. As we drove home he couldn't stop looking at me ( he taught me how to drive yrs ago he didn't even remind me of the turn signals or red lights like he does) he kept telling me about his trip and he couldn't stop thinking of our kids, then I kept quickly changing the subject , like directions or something was wrong with the car and I couldn't get it fixed yet, so he never finished that conversation. Later at home we all had big long hugs and we all cried...I did hug him hold him tight and we talked about my worries I did see a tear come from his eyes telling it was going to be ok he'd be home soon and he's supposed to handle all the hard men stuff and he could do it. . When we first has sex against first he kept telling me how much he missed me soo much and lives me and hugging me holding me, it was soooo emotional for me it was hard to speak so I did try and say the same soon he kept telling me to say the same things, I did but soon after I said shut up as I was about to explode with tears I didn't want him to know how I felt... Later that too I regretted. Think I shouldn't had hold back.... Months later same old.. He told my mom he thinks I don't care for him, I didn't say anything she did though but it didn't help... Now I cents him drifting away farther, not sure how to handle it can't speak up but somethings gotta change. I want better, I need better to fix us or move on.......
