Drummerguy18

Day 5 Still think about her a lot through out the day (all positive memories of course). I do realize that maybe it was for the best though. We are in college and it is not fair to not experience this to its fullest. Starting to see it as more of an opportunity to learn from it and become more emotionally independent. I'm going to keep working on myself and take it from there. I hope she does text me on my birthday though (three weeks). It would be nice to know that there are no hard feelings and I don't think I would try to start a conversation. I would most likely just say thank you and continue with the day. It's just so hard to know that out of 5 relationships on her side, she said ours was the best and that she had never felt like that for anyone else. I've only been in one and I can say that I definitely loved her. Maybe one day when we are both in a more stable environment we can revisit that love.

DAY 4 Had a rough last night. For some reason I had a dream that my ex and I were dancing and having fun. Weird as hell and I did not need to wake up remembering that dream as it just spiraled into me thinking about all the things we did together. Had classes today and I worked out and played pickup basketball to keep myself busy in between. One more class for the day and then I plan on studying and just hanging out until I decide to go to bed. Still thinking about her throughout the day though and I wish I could stop. The only thing I seem to be hung up on now is that there may be some possibility for it to work out after college, but that is pretty ridiculous. Hopefully it will get easier from here.

DAY 3 I started NC three days ago, but did not see this thread until now. I thought about her all weekend long without fail and I'm miserable. We've been apart for two months now and we were really in love. We were together for 14 months and it started in high school. Distance caused problems (two different colleges) and I called it off, but I regret it. She is doing well and is very clear that she does not want to be in a relationship with anyone for the time being. I suppose she's enjoying herself in college. In three weeks it will be my birthday, and although I do not expect any kind of message from her, I am afraid that she will say happy birthday and I will break. She's going to Rome for six weeks towards the end of May and I would really like to see her before, but I cannot do it in this stage. I am not sure if I should ever talk to her again, but I know that for the last two months I have thought of nothing else but the love that we shared.