used to like her, i guess i still do

[punkrawker359]

i used to like this girl like a year or so ago, but since then we've become good friends, and i've always thought of her as being really pretty/beatiful/whatever word u'd like to put.

 

but just recently she started liking one of my best friends and its been really weird because her reason for not really wanting to go out with me is because she was a junior and i was a freshmen, now a year later with my friend the same age as me, are now goin to homecoming and probly will go out.

 

my question really starts here, when i found out that they were goin to homecoming together i started feeling really sad and bummed out, and i thought that i didn't have any feelings really left of her that way, but i guess i do. i just want some advice on this situation on how to handle it and a way to get by it. i like this other girl since i stopped havin a crush on the first girl, but i dunno, just need some help.

 

thanks

\Punkrawker/

 

ps sorry for bein long...again

[charmed]

Hi punkrawker,

 

It sounds to me like she made that excuse about the age difference to avoid telling you that she wasn't attracted to you. Of course, there is always the possibility that she really simply does not know what she wants - but you should know which she actually is. So that leaves you with the situation of how to deal with the harboured feelings that you have for her. It seems that you are feeling jealousy and possibly resent for not having putting this one to rest some time before. She is going to date with this guy for a night, and hey, they might end up together. Thats between them - and you should thread carefully so as not to loose her as a friend.

 

You will have to condition yourself out of this situation. Use the power of your will, and help yourself learn more about yourself and the feelings you are feeling as a result of this situation. You will probably find yourself in this situation - I know I've been there a few times - heck we all have - but you must learn about the difference between

 

"being friends with at girl after her saying she won't go out with you and actually being genuinly only friends and you having no issues with her seeing people anytime"

OR

""being friends with at girl after her saying she won't go out with you and harbouring feelings which inevitably end up in your own heartache as you were playing under a false pretence".

 

If is next to impossible for many guys to remain friends with a girl they let their guard down to and who were rejected by whatever way. It takes a conditioning, and an understanding of the situation at hand. Then you can learn to cope with this situation in the future.

 

Remember, you have the power to get her as a friend and be happy within yourself that you could achieve that, and regain control of your emotions

 

Good luck, and hope this helps you some

 

~Charmed~

[punkrawker359]

yeah, i had already assumed the age thing when she had told me it a year ago, i never really bought it. but anyway, i get what ur sayin, thanks for your help. ill be sure to keep it in mind.

 

lAtER

\Punkrawker/

[punkrawker359]

oh yeah, nearly forgot. this doesnt have anything to do with my feelings about her, rather this other guy's obsession with her. he's literally had a "stalking" incident with her.

 

he had followed me, my friend, her, and her friend around in a parking lot like at 11 at night and when we went over to him, he floored it in reverse and took off, denying the whole thing the next day.

 

this guy is their friend, even though they treat him like much less. i'm literally afriad he might hurt himself or others when he finds out that she's going with him to homecoming and might be going out. i can find a way to deal with it, but he's the kind of person thats really pyschotic. he's not a big strong guy, but he's just really lanky and weird. i'm really scared for the girl, my friend and the 'other guy'. i'd really like help with this.

 

thanks

\Punkrawker/