We broke up..

[heatheRmal]

OVER MSN INSTANT MESSENGER!

How low can you be..

 

But still, I don't know what to say about it.

I want to be with him because I love him, even though I was the one wthat had to fix everything in our relationship, I was always the reason for the fights (so he says), and I was the one that screwed everything over.

ALL BECASUE I WENT OVER MY FRIENDS HOUSE AFTER I TOLD HIM I DIDN'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING!

And guess what, I told him "I'm going to Ashleys, then if you want we can do something"

I went over her house becuase it was her birthday!

I don't see any logical explination for this break up..

I cried myself to sleep from 8pm until 7am and my dad tried to wake me up at 7:30am for school and i just layed there staring at the ceiling.. he let me stay home.

 

 

I really don't know what to do with myself now that he's gone.

You know that saying "Don't make someone your everything because when they're gone you'll have nothing" ? Well.. I think it's a bit late for that now isn't it.

 

I was addicted to cocaine for two years in grade 8 and 9, and I did acid and E on the weekends. I'm in grade 11 now, almost halfway through and I havn't touched any drugs (other than pot) since then. Lastnight I felt like calling up my old dealer and getting him to deliver me a bunch..

 

When I was with Darren I felt beautiful, he's the first person to ever make me feel beautiful, EVER In my entire life!

But now that he broke up with me, I feel like the most worthless ugliest piece of scum on the earth..

 

I just want to get over him as fast as I can.. but I hope me and him can still be friends..

 

I just wish I was strong enough to get through this as easily as other people do..

[nadine_3110]

I really hope that you don't go back to drugs, it's definitely not the solution to anything least of all a break-up. It sounds like this guy of yours was very unstable to begin with and it sounds like he was just looking for an excuse to break up with you. You went to see your friend on her bday, there's nothing wrong with that, just seems like there's something else that he didn't tell you. Some other reason why he wanted to break it off. Maybe he just wasn't feeling the same things you were. Things like this are always hard, especially if you loved the guy. And that saying is completely right.

 

I'm guessing this guy was your first bf, or not, just saying that cus it sounds like you are pretty young. The first one is always the hardest one to get over and he will always hold a dear place in your heart, you'll never forget him. But eventually, when the time is right, you will move on. And don't do like me and set it in your head that you will never find someone like him. You'll probably find someone better. Try not to miss school because of this guy or resort to doing drugs again, he's not worth that.

 

There's nothing I can say to make you feel better and I know it but just keep posting about your feelings and we'll keep responding. Good luck with everything!

 

*Hugs*

[heatheRmal]

Thanks for the reply

I've had alot of boyfriends, probably more than I can count, and there was one that I thought I loved but once I met Darren, that all went down the drain because I cared for him so much more than anyone else.

My friends, during their off class, came over to cheer me up

So I'm feeling better now, but I still really miss him

 

And even though my mom sat up all night with me, talking about how she knows how hard this is for me, she refuses to let me go to the movies with Ashley.

Ashley called and said she knows I don't want to lounge around the house alone so she wants to take me to the movies, and my other friend Jill is out of town for the night, so I said okay. I went downstairs to ask my mom for $10 after I clean my room (it's a HUGE mess, it's worth the $10 aha) she said she's been getting after me for my room for the past week, and I have been cleaning it, it's so much cleaner than it was before, but she still refuses to give me the $10 for the movies, so I can't do that..

UGH, I know thats not a big deal but I'm so aggitated right now and that made me super mad..

[heatheRmal]

WOOHOO! WERE BACK TOGETHER!

i had an actual serious talk for the first time in my life (litterally)

and were good now

he apologized for like, every little tiny thing hes ever done O_O

but yeah, were back together

and i couldnt be happier