my mother and me

[demons-princess]

me and my mother have always been real close but latley we cant stop fighting its like i cant go a day without having an argument with my mom we dont have fun anymore and i dont feel i can talk to her!thats not how i wanted it when i was little i always thought me and my mom would be the best of friends but now we cant even look at each other i want to tell her im sorry but when i do we still end up arguing and since l.j died its gotten worse...i want to tell her im sorry but that dosent make us closer...what am i spossed to do getting desprate for us to be cllose like we used to

[PersonalMe]

hey, well i think the problems you are having is because of the loss you both are feeling, as well, as the fact that you're a teenager and maybe your mum is going through menopause, which means you both are having alot of hormone changes, and its hard to talk to us women, when we have these little problems, i think its nice that you want to say sorry and i totally recomend it, but you say that when you try you just get into an argument again, i think you should try a different aproach, write her a letter with EVERYTHING you feel, that way she cant interrupt you while you're talking to start an argument, she'll just have to read the whole letter. i hope i helped bye!!

[RandomAdvisor]

It sounds like what you are going through is very normal for someone your age. We usually get along very well with our parents when we're little kids, but as we get older and move into the teenage years things start to change and we're at odds more and more with our parents.

 

Without knowing the details of what you're argueing about no one can really give you specific advice...

 

You say you've been wanting to say you're sorry. Have you actually said it though? You think it wont change anything, but how will you know unless you try?

[RayKay]

Honestly...it is part of the shift that happens as you go through your teens. You are forming your own identity, your mother is adapting as are you. When I was in my teens and lived at home, I and my mother clashed often too...as a child we were close, but the fact is we clashed as I was learning my own independence. The truth too is that we were so tremendously alike that in a way it meant we did not get along then!

 

My mother and I used to have a notebook we would pass back and forth talking about concerns and issues, and always saying I love you. It sometimes cut down on the emotional face to face confrontations. We would say sorry in there, or she would say she was worried about me, things like that.

 

Time does change things though, I am now very close to my mother again, as I have found that identity that is me, and we have a great friendship component to that mother-daughter relationship too.

[demons-princess]

thank you all youve helped honestly a great amount