Help!

[hayleyrosa]

I use this username alot these days, I don't want people searching for it and finding old posts that dont affect me anymore, I've moved on and dont want messy reminders. Sorry.

[TooNiceAGuy]

Hi Hayleyrosa,

 

I think you both have issues you need to deal with here. Yes you're both young, but emotions run wild no matter what age you're in. The fact that you get suicidal thoughts when your loved one is treating you bad is very very bad. You should never get into a state where you want to end your life because of someone you love shouting at you, or any other reason for that matter.

 

You love him, but at the same time you hate how he treats you. It also sounds like you both ended up being in a long-distance relationship when you went of to Uni, which are hard in themselves.

 

You need to ask yourself if the way the relationship has been going is how you want it to continue. I'm pretty sure your answer here is "no". If you're thinking about ending your life because of him, then he is NOT good for you. Period. You need to start thinking about yourself, and your well being. And I think you need to go hang out some more with your best friends, and tell them what's going on, they can support you through this as well.

 

When you meet him, tell him the truth. Tell him that you love him, but the way things have been going is not the way you can continue living, with him. You need to move on, and break contact for a while.

 

I checked your blog, and it sounds like you're doing better. Just post here if you have feelings of suicide and what not, we'll all help as best we can. Just remember, this is about YOU feeling happy. That's where you need to get to.

[armchairshrink]

Hi, Hayleyrosa,

 

Just read your post and parts of your blog (my toddler wouldn't let me read much). I don't have too much time, but I wanted to make sure to tell you: trust Alan. If Alan thinks he's "a jumped up little egotistical, attention seeking f**kwitt", then he probably is.

 

Your man doesn't sound like a very safe person for you to love right now. Anyone who yells at you and makes you think suicidal thoughts is Not Good. I hope that you really are getting over him, because he sure isn't helping you.

 

You're getting help for your depression, that's good. Don't let him ruin your progress. Post here as often as you need to; we'll be here. Take care!

[hayleyrosa]

Met up with him yesterday. He was so nice to me, he hasn't been so kind and considerate in ages. He said theres not a chance of us getting back together but the look in his eyes and his body language were saying something different.

I know its not sensible but I love him so much, I've never had this trouble with break ups before, it always made sense to end them but this time, I can't understand why we are not together when its so evident we both want to be.

[hayleyrosa]

Things have been getting so much worse. I don't understand, I was getting better last week but now I'm just stuck.

 

I keep breaking down and sobbing, not just crying but sobbing and throwing things. I'm losing control of myself. I can't help it, all I want to do is see my ex but I know I cant. We met up again and I tried to be nice and happy but had to leave because I started crying. I can't keep going on like this, I'm miserable all the time.

[polaris]

I'm sorry for your pain, hayleyrosa. It's really the worst feeling in the world, during those early days after a breakup.

 

You will get better, hard as it is to see right now, but the quickest way to do that is to maintain a strict no contact. It hurts like hell at the beginning, and losing control is perfectly normal, but it will begin to improve soon, and you'll be able to start to live your life again.

 

Hang on in there; we're all here for you.