I don't know what to do...

[atomic40]

Hello all,

 

I am in a crazy state of emotions right now. I have been single for about two years now, my last relationship of two years ending badly. It turned out my ex girlfriend was sleeping with someone I knew. I have recently been hanging out with someone I know from my hometown. I live in Boston now and she recently moved here. I have stayed over her place about 5 times, not having sex with her, just sleeping with her and occasionally kissing. So last night we finally talked about where we were going with the whole situation. I pretty much said I did not want to get involved in a relationship at the moment. I am not sure if she is right for me or not. I also think I am scared from my last relationship because I find myself wondering what would happen if this did not work out. Also, I am in the midst of deciding on a career change. I am 25 and have been out of school for a couple years working in the legal field. I was planning on going to law school but after working in law firms for two years I am not so sure it is for me. Point is, I may be going back to school this year for something totally different. I am the type of person who would not be able to balance working full time, going to school at night, and handling a relationship. I would simply just put my life on hold to spend time with her. I just do not think it fair to her to put her through this since I am so unsure of what is going on in my life right now. I don't know what to do. Any thoughts on this would be appreciated.

[BellaDonna]

It sounds like you have a fear of commitment, not simply for relationships but for life overall. You are finding it hard to commit to a career, and to take the next step to forming a relationship.

 

I am the type of person who would not be able to balance working full time, going to school at night, and handling a relationship.

 

There are many many people who are able to do this. Are you sure you're just not scared since you got hurt the last time and using this an an excuse? You are over-thinking the whole thing.

 

Even with work and school- there is always time you can find for FUN. IF you don't allow yourself to have fun you'll turn into zombie and slave to capitalism. What do you do for FUN? Can you share fun with someone else?

 

If you like this girl then why not give it a try? You can always take it slow and then re-evaluate, instead of just writing it off so fast due to pessimism.

 

BellaDonna