Should I stay?

[MelissaD]

Hi.....

I have this problem.....My boyfriend, who I've been dating for almost 10 months, is a sophomore, and I am a junior in high school. He is older than me, almost 18, and he was held back for a second year of grade 10 when he failed last year. Today I found out that he will be held back AGAIN next year, so i will be a senior, him a sophomore. I know it sounds cruel and heartless, but I am slightly embarrassed about this situation. I love him a lot, he was my first everything. It's not that he's slack or stupid, but expressing himself on paper just doesn't "flow" with him, and it frustrates him so much that he just can't explain himself with a pen. My problem is this----I'll be graduating next year, and I want a good future for myself, but I don't want to hang around, waiting 2 more years (or more!) for him to join me outside of high school. I always figured if you loved someone enough, nothing would stand in your way and hinder you being with them. Now I realize is it easier said than done. I love him so so much.

 

Melissa

[segagirl]

oh dear....i assume you will get lots of posts on this one.

we sometimes feel guilty about leaving those we love behind. But you have to keep living, growing and trying new things.

some will say,,,at the first test of your love you will leave him for that? and others will say screw it leave him, live your life.

I have to say it really depends on your goals, what you seek in a mate, do you see yourself spending your life with him and what are your plans for meeting new people in college? these things will tell you how you feel, totally unrelated to where he is in school.

sometimes we have to leave our first loves behind in order to learn new things, experience new lives and learn about what it really means to be ready to stand by your man.

[Stupid Guy]

i feel like there is always a solution if you love someone - and there is no obstacle too big. With that I mean to say - okay, you'll be off to college and he'll be in high-school - does that mean you have to stop being together?

 

If it does for you - then thats what you should do. If you do love him more than anything and can see your future with him, then you should both talk about it and figure out how you can come to a solution that works for both of you.

 

Eventually these things will work themselves out one way or another.

[pi_anochik]

Well, you can't just put your life on hold for him, but that doesn't mean that you guys can't be together! I would suggest you go off to college, and keep in touch with him! You guys can email each other, call each other, write letters, there are so many ways to stay in touch nowdays! If you meet someone new at college, you do, if you don't, you don't. What's meant to happen will happen.