help me - reading too much into this??/

[kirstyski25]

Hi

[runman]

I'm guessing you might still like him

 

It's a chance for you to be alone with the guy, which means... you can keep a friendship going, that's where all relationships start, and it sounds like he's willing to listen if you have anything you'd like to tell him which probably means he still wants something to do with you. Doesn't mean you going to get back together, but start with friends if you still like him, and take it from there.

[kirstyski25]

Yeah I am still so in love with him. i have acepted the fact that he has gone out of my life and it is me that has to change, and i am determined to show him this. But happens if I break down and cry in front of him? I am so worried about that and how do I start talking to him???

[heloladies21]

You didn't blow anything, but when you see him, don't bring up anything about the relationship, or where you two stand, or anything serious like that. I would be civil, but quick about giving him his stuff and pretend like I have something to do. Just some small talk (about work, car, something like that) for 5 minutes then tell him it was nice to see him but you have to go. Then go into No Contact and see what he does. He will have to be the one to bring up trying again if he ever decides that's what he wants to do.

 

You don't have to change one bit for this guy. If he can't accept you the way you are, he doesn't deserve the honor of being with you. You have to believe this. And I'm never friends with my exes. It's always way too hard to surpress my feelings.

[CarterJonas]

kirstyski25,

 

Why did you two break up? Was it on the cards or just over a silly argument? and how long have you been broken up?

[kirstyski25]

See i am still not sure why. we got on so well, and had silly arguments, but we alsways resolved them. All the time. we were great together. Then on the Monday, I had an interview for an MSc and got the place starting September. i text him and told him the news and he kept on saying that well done and he loves me. He then said can we stay at yours tonight and I said yeah, he came over and said two words - we are over. That was it, i told him to leave as i was in tears, and he got up and left. i have not seen him since the 21st, and on that wednesday i rang him and said that I loved him, and we could start again. fresh start he said no, i have not told him how i feel about him or anything at all. just been pleasant and friendly if he calls or texts me. I miss him terribly and wish he was back in my life.

[runman]

loss sucks, I know, I think i'm about three weeks ahead of you, and for me it's getting harder, but it doesn't for all.

 

All i've found out... time will tell, and everything must playout in it's own time, life cannot be rushed and must be lived from one day to the next, that's about all I can focus on at the moment, when we rush things, we can stuff them up. Live for the feeling in your memory, yes that happy one, because that's what you're really after, so live for the next one, not the last one.

 

The best and hardest thing is to know you're not the first, and will not be the last. How anyone else could feel like you is hard to believe, but here we are, you'll make it through a better person, you'll be one of the lucky ones to see all beauty and all pain in the world, you're more human than you know it... well... now your starting to know it. Remember this is coming from someone feeling just like you. If we can take this, we can take anything. Good luck is what I want to hear, so Good Luck to you

[kirstyski25]

he has just text me and said tha he will be over at 6:30pm and that he ius ringing his mum with him to get his stuff. He does not even live with her, and she lives over two hours away. i cant believe this, first one minute he says he needs to tlak to me the next he says his mum will be here. Why oh why is he doing this to me>? i dont even understand what I did wrong to him.

[lady00]

I think you need to let him go. If he's bringing his mom, he doesn't really want to talk to you alone. He is coming to get his stuff...he wants to move out and move on from this relationship, and the only thing you can do is let him. If he is going to come back, he has to realize that on his own. He has to want the relationship back. He cannot be convinced of this by anyone besides himself. Hanging on now is probably going to lead to a lot of pain for you. My advice is to just let him be for now and keep your distance. Don't worry about how you're "supposed" to act mysterious, don't try to play games of psyche him out...just let him take his things and go...and try to heal.

[CarterJonas]

Life can be so hard sometimes, but as lady said if he is bringing him mum then it is probably for emotional support. With my last breakup I also never got an explanation as to why she wanted to breakup, she just said so on the day, totally unexpected on my behalf, packed her things and went. I've never heard from her since nor have I tried to make contact.

 

This was over a year ago now and during this time I have come to realise that the way she treated me was totally unacceptable and she was soo the wrong person for me. I never want to see or speak to her again.

 

On the positive things will get better with time and eventually when you start to feel better and start dating again things will be a lot less painful.

 

Does he have a key to your place? If so do you need to be home when he comes to pick up his stuff?