kantore Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 Well I have not had contact with my EX-GF for almost a year now! I am glad that there is distance between us, because us keeping in touch was not for the right reasons. But lately I have been curious about what she is doing and where she is at. I have decided for my own best intrest I am not going to contact her, but would talk to her if she ever contacted me. I do care for her greatly, and will always love her, for what we had. Infact I would love for her to call me just so we can catch up...I mean I am doing great in life, and want to share that with her! But one thing that keeps popping up in my head is the thought that our paths will magically cross again. Last I heard from her she was living in a different State than myself.....but I run into people from my past all the time, and feel like we are going to run onto eachother as well......How many of you believe that paths always do cross again? or is it just me?? any advice or comments? Link to comment
Luciana Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 In practical terms, your chances of crossing paths with her if she lives in another state are almost 0. Unless she visits your city frequently and goes to the same places you do and have the same firends. If not, it is almost impossible in the big USA with millions and millions to run into someone from another state! You can provoke it though, trying to find out where she will be and pretending you just ran into her by coincidence...sounds very romantic, like "The Notebook". Link to comment
GettingOverIt Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 Ahhh... Serendipity... The funny thing about it is that we like to 'force' these 'chance' meetings.... I think it is funny how many times a 'chance' meeting was really set up from the get go.... In all honesty, chances are pretty slim you would see this person again... But, there is always a chance you or she could set things in motion which would serve as a catalyst for meeting again... You are offered a trip to her state, for example, and you just 'happen' to take it... I do not believe actively seeking someone out is serendipity... If I am looking for you, and I find you (no matter HOW it came about), then I set things in motion to help that happen... Link to comment
DreamLilies Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 Once I dated this guy for a couple of months. Then I had to leave town and we broke up. About a year later, I saw him in a supermarket in the new city I was living in, 400 miles away from where he and I had lived. I quickly turned around and went down another aisle, and out of the store. He didn't see me. But in the brief moment when I saw him, my heart almost pounded out of my chest. I think it was just nerves. I actually run into people from my past quite a bit, probably about once every two months. But that was the only time I had ever "almost run into" someone I had dated. Link to comment
a.d.c. Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 Ahhh... Serendipity... The funny thing about it is that we like to 'force' these 'chance' meetings.... I think it is funny how many times a 'chance' meeting was really set up from the get go I had to laugh when I read that. I've been guilty of that so many times and luckily it's gone how I pictured it most of the time. I hate to say it (though I don't feel guilty) but 2 months ago I went to an old high school aquaintences funeral with the ulterior motive of seeing a few old girlfriends from back in those days. And sure enough 3 of them were there. I hadn't seen them in a few years. But I knew this "chance" meeting could very well turn into a probable meeting so I went. I don't know. Would you all say I'm bad for that? I hope I don't come off as coldhearted cuz I'm not. But I really wanted to see them and it was the perfect opportunity Link to comment
DreamLilies Posted March 30, 2005 Share Posted March 30, 2005 Well, Hockeyboy, it's a long, complicated story why I ran. But in a nutshell, I ran away from home and severed ties with everyone back home, including him. When I saw him, I panicked because I thought that I'd never see him again, so seeing him was like seeing a ghost. Plus, he was with another girl, and I was with another guy, and I didn't want any awkward situation to happen. Did that make sense? Link to comment
shockeddismayed Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 Ahhh... Serendipity... The funny thing about it is that we like to 'force' these 'chance' meetings.... I think it is funny how many times a 'chance' meeting was really set up from the get go.... For sure... this can be true even if you aren't entirely sure you've "forced it" deliberately... many shades of grey. For example: When I was in college, I dated a younger girl for a few months just before the "EXGF"... so I guess this younger girl would be the EX-EX. Anyway, things didn't work out at the time... the age gap seemed too big (at that moment), so I ended things when I met EXGF. Six years later, I'd moved for my first job, 500 miles away and started "adult" life with my EXGF. We were almost ready to be married. Bought a house, the works... Then EXGF runs into EX-EX in the bank. EX-EX has moved here to start grad-school. EXGF tells me and I tell her I'm not-surprised... I'd bumped into EXEX at a wedding a year prior (with EXGF on my arm) and she'd mentioned a school in my city was on her list. EXGF seemed a bit put-off that I hadn't told her EXEX might be moving to town, but I brushed it off... "why on earth would it be newsworthy?" I'd said... besides "I broke it off with her because the moment I met you (EXGF), I knew what I wanted". And this was true. But, in the back of my mind, I was curious about EXEX, but I was also "madly" in love with EXGF (despite her growing insecurity), so I didn't seek EXEX out at all. Still, she'd pop in my head from time to time and I bumped into her twice. A year later, EXGF dumps my butt.... A year of recovery later, and things with EXEX look like they may take off. I must say I'm excited about the prospect of that! So did EXEX contrive to see me again? Was it just chance or school admissions? Did EXGF's unfounded jealousy and insecurity of EXEX contrive to make me single, or.... did my curiosity show up in (mostly) subconscious ways and put a damper on my then-current relationship with EXGF? One never knows for sure.... probably some combo of all the above... Link to comment
Mun Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 Wow S&D .. if you end up married to the EXEX that would be a great plot for a movie... I run into someone from my past (13 yrs ago) ever so often because we live in the same city-- only he moved here after I had known him... everytime I'd see him my heart would sink to my knees... until November when I saw him last and felt nothing... it took this long to lose that feeling Link to comment
Tulula Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 I'm a great believer in 'fate'. If it's fated that your paths were meant to cross again, then they will will and most likely when you least expect it. I bumped into my ex, after we'd been apart for six years. He's a guy I thought I'd never see again as I moved long distance, chances were very slim that we'd ever see each other again. Then one night I went out with friends...........guess who was there? The ex!! He was the last person I was expecting to see, likewise I was the last person he had expected to see. So it was 'fate' that we'd bumped into one another again. We'd exchanged pleasantries, then went our separate ways once more....... Then around five years later and out of the blue, this same guy contacts me via email. He'd traced me via the web (I was registered with a 'friends' website). This wasn't fate as our 'first' meeting had been, it was a DECISION he'd made himself to contact me.....so our paths did cross again, but it was a 'forced' thing. Link to comment
hockeyboy Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 man...i need to stop reading this post. all its doing is making me think of how someday maybe ill run into my first true love and things will magically work out and all that.....even though i dont want that...got me thinking about it...time to change the channel (in my head) Link to comment
shockeddismayed Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 man...i need to stop reading this post. all its doing is making me think of how someday maybe ill run into my first true love and things will magically work out and all that..... Or maybe you DO want that, and you just don't know it. Link to comment
hockeyboy Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 man...i need to stop reading this post. all its doing is making me think of how someday maybe ill run into my first true love and things will magically work out and all that..... Or maybe you DO want that, and you just don't know it. well ill say this. im not gonna go out and make it happen. it would literally have to happen by complete chance...no "push of the ball" so to speak by me. i could not be comfortable with her again anyways...if i ever could...it would be a good decade away. i learned...never say never...but i will say, as i said once about something like this last year..."theres a better shot of the red sox winning the world series.." oh..wait.... Link to comment
Wildcat21 Posted March 31, 2005 Share Posted March 31, 2005 Pick up the phone and call! Find her number. Get it from a friend. CALL!!!!! Slowly but surely you could re-develop the relationship. ESPECIALLY IF YOU needed to change - OR you know WHY the relationship went sour. CALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What is would be the worst case scenario. Link to comment
Tulula Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 I agree with everyone else hockeyboy, try and find her 8) Sounds to me that this is what you really what you want to do. Guy in my situation was my 'first love', likewise I was his and he made the move to contact me and despite a nasty breakup a few years ago. As I said, I'd bumped into him by chance one time when I was out with friends, then he contacted me by email a few years after. We caught up on the past, went over old ground, discussed our past relationship, where we'd went wrong, etc, etc. Both of us had changed a lot over the years and we found that we could be 'friends' now. You might find that you and your 'first love' can be 'friends now, maybe even rekindle something more. Worst case scenario is, is that she wouldn't reply. Well then I guess that this would let you know where you stand and you can then finally move on and away. Link to comment
hockeyboy Posted April 1, 2005 Share Posted April 1, 2005 well this is kantore's post..and i agree he should call his girl. however..me...no....i know she has a bf right now Link to comment
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