i'm not quite sure if i lost my virginity

[party_of_italy]

last night i tried having sex for the first time. the guy and i have liked each other for a really long time now. the thing is, we couldn't get it all the way in. so i dunno if that counts as losing my virginity or not. he had on a condom, but i don't think it was lubricated so it wasn't working too well. i did rip a bit and it did hurt so i don't think i'm a virgin anymore, but then again we didn't really have actual "sex" we were mostly working on getting it in as far as we could first. what do you think?

[CarrieB123]

You need to be a bit more careful, if you are "ripping" that is not good.

 

If you are really young I suggest that you hold off a bit more, sex too early sometimes leads to sexual problems later on.

 

And if the guy is much older your body may not be ready for sex with him yet.

[party_of_italy]

ok, i'm quite old enough, and he's only 1 year older than me. i didn't want to be lectured on that, i wrote the forum because i just want the answer, if, given those circumstances, i'm still a virgin or not. and when i said ripping, i don't mean unhealthy ripping, i meant stretching my vagina out so that it could go in, i wasn't bleeding or anything.

[RayKay]

My definition of losing your virginity would be penetration of the vagina by the penis...so yes, I would consider that losing your virginity whether he got all the way in or not. Of course some people have different definitions.

 

Next time, use lots of lubrication such as KY, or Astroglide. It will help things a lot, and be much easier. Without any ripping/or tearing of tissues inside vaginal wall.

[tinkerbell_79]

I would say, yes, that you've lost your virginity.

 

I think the first time isn't always exactly what we picture it to be. Your description kind of reminds me of my own first time. And the thing about it is, once you've sort of broken that boundary, I think you start to realize that it's not like this perfect initiation. Where you go from inexperienced virgin to fully knowledgeable sexually active adult. I guess what I'm saying is it takes some practice before you feel at all skilled or confident.

 

I wish you good luck.

And I second the suggestion for the astroglide. It makes life much easier.