I'm having the hardest time letting him go... I need help.

[lifeisaparadox]

I've been in this relationship for almost 3 years and for the last two I've realized we started going down different paths. Right now we're both in completely different parts of our lives and our maturity level is completely different. I've known that we needed to leave each other for a while but I keep going back, believing that we can work it out even though we constantly run into the same problem.

 

Even so, we're incompatible at the moment since our goals in life are complete opposite and I really want to find someone who can support me in my stage (which is settling with my career, growing up, etc.) and he is just not mentally ready for this. Not even financially. We haven't been able to take any vacations because he keeps blowing his money on useless things like partying, because that's where his mental stage is at the moment.

 

I'm having trouble letting him go. We are doing NC but he was my best friend and I have the urge to type in his number just to tell him about my day. How do I avoid these temptations? I've known nothing but him for the last 3 years -- which were critical years to me as so much in my life changed -- and I have no other friends because of the transition I made to uni. My friends that I do have are leaving the city/country since it is back-to-school season. I have nobody to help keep my mind off of him, it's scary.

[Acrylamide]

I would suggest picking up a new hobby or a gym membership. Take this time to develop yourself. Do not make any form of contact with him. You are right about finding someone who can support you. He obviously isn't ready to make a transition (I assume he went to your Uni and partied a lot).

 

Things will get better, but they take a variable amount of time. For now you should focus on your career goals and yourself. Hang in there!

 

Cheers.