Guys gone wild

[StandTall]

It has been quite a while since I felt the need to post, which I suppose is a good thing. I am finally in the recovery stages of a gut-wrenching relationship which ended earlier this year, and have become quite the dating machine. The problem I am finding is that I have hurt some people along the way. I am somewhat colder than I used to be, and am much more cautious about my feelings at this point rather than someone else's. I was just wondering if anyone else finds themselves in this place. I have been on 5 different dates this week which is great for one's confidence level, but it can also be an empty feeling in which you feel as if you are overcompensating to avoid being alone. Thoughts?

[69_king]

5 dates with 5 different girls in one week ?? I can't relate to that. You probably will hurt somebody somehow doing that stuff, not seriously but its still not nice. I think it might be better to get to know these girls a little more rather than throwing them away after one date. As for being alone, I guess it can be weird after a long relationship, but millions of people are alone, don't be scared of it, its not forever, and try not to use people to fill your void.

[jbutterfly2020]

Well at least you are getting over it by getting out there and meeting new girls. I think you stated it correctly that you are overcompensating for the emptiness. 5 dates a week is impressive but were they fun? Before you go on another date, stop and think just for a minute. Ask yourself why are you going on the date? If you have interest in the girl then go for it. If it is just to help you forget, then do not go.

 

Sadly, past relationships can sometimes leaving us with the feeling to guard our hearts. I believe that when we meet a person that we truly like, that guard will come down without effort or notice.

 

 

Just a question, where are you meeting these girls?

[marijo2480]

I think you know what the problem is. You're afraid of being lonely. The question for you is that if you know you're hurting the person, then it's intentional. Isn't it? Do you think that's fair? Just because you were hurt does not mean that you have to be hurtful towards other people to avoid you getting hurt. Realize that you will hurt 1000 times before meeting the right person. I'd do a million things and go through a million bad relationships to find that special person. It's worth it man. I think it's okay to date around if you're single and yeah if I were a guy, I probably would feel good to have five dates in one single week. But, in your case, I think you're doing this for all the wrong reasons. Get to know different women, but be truthful to them. If you lose interest, let them go and move on. Don't date just to not be lonely. Seems like you have some major insecurities that need be resolved before you think of getting in a relationship. Have fun, be yourself and be a gentleman at the same time. You'd attract even more women, and probably potentially better women as well. Good luck!

 

Marie

[69_king]

Just a question, where are you meeting these girls?

 

yeah, I'd like to know that too. What, is it a club or something?

Can you give me the address?? Please?

 

[StandTall]

Actually,I have pretty much met them all in person as I'm not shy at all. I think I am just trying to avoid getting hurt, so I've put myself in the driver's seat. I used to be the nicest guy, and it never paid off. I am kind of determined to never let anyone get the best of me again. I am hoping that I will recognize a great woman if she were to enter my life. It has really been a long, long year of learning for me.

[StandTall]

Ironically, it seems my dating streak has come to an end. It doesn't surprise me as most of them seemed very superficial. The best part is I feel OK, as I was somewhat overwhelmed. It is surprising to go from a date here and there to a date-a-thon. Unfortunately, it seems pretty difficult for me to take anyone seriously after what I've been through. I would really like to go on a date with a great girl and have my faith restored.

[wanderer]

frown. i have trouble finding one date, much less 5 in a week, with 5 different girls. you must have some real talent for that. use it, but don't abuse it.

[StandTall]

I don't know if I would call it talent. I would much rather have quality over quantity.

[wanderer]

agreed. i meant you have a talent for finding single girls, and getting them to go out with you. i can't even find any outside of school.