I've cried tonight again.

[cafeman]

Hi,

I have been reading some posts for sometimes and I JUST decided to became a member.

 

My ex left me 2 months ago. We have lived together for 2 yrs. She moved out and left me with a ring I gave her. We haven't been contacting each other much. We have agreed not to see each other for 30 days. Today is the 30th day. She called and left me with a message saying she is going out of town and she still have mails coming to my resident. So, I decided to drop them of for her, by the way, she moved in to a new apt. on her own. As I pulled in the parking lot, there was light in her living room, so I called, she said she is home. I kept on talking to her on the phone while knocking on her door. She said, "wait". Then I saw the someone came peek at the door from inside. She said she was in the bathroom. I immediately knew there is someone else besides her in the apt. I told her open up anyway, I said, " I know someone is in there besides you, I know you are seeing someone, I just wanna drop off the mails." She told me to wait by her car. After a minutes or so, she walked out and I asked who is in there. A guy of course, how silly am I to ask. She said she is seeing him for few weeks and she also have slept with another guy one time.

 

My heart just dropped and I held strong. This is a woman I thought would be a mother of my child and now, she acts so recklessly, juggling two guys at the same time. I never thought of her that way. I told her ti be careful getting sexual diseases. She said she is using protection.

 

I care about her, I do. I told myself even if we can't be lovers, I still want her to be friends. Hearing her voice comforts me. But, the truth is I just felt too weak around her. She will suck me back in.

 

Anyway, I told her to be safe and she is driving back to Nashville as I wrote this. It's her cousin's birthday. Man, I do love her families. All her sisters called me brother in law even we haven't been engage or marry. We have been dating and living for 2 1/2 years. I met everyone on her families. Wasted love????

 

Well, She said she will call me later when she comes back. maybe she will introduce her new bf to me. I do wish her happy and hope she finds someone who loves her, the love she deserved from me. Tonight, I think I have closure now. I can really move on. I know this is a everyday process and I need to take babystep, and I pray the Lord give me strength to get through this.

 

At last, God bless you all, thanks for listening.

[Mun]

Hi Cafeman,

Hang in there. I think one of the hardest things to go through is to finally come to terms with the fact that things are over. Somewhere deep inside we always have a little hope left.

 

You sound like a very caring person. I am sure you will make it through.

 

Best wishes

[dontknowwhattodo]

Hey Cafeman, BE STRONG!

[2rublueeyes21]

I am so sorry for the pain this lady has caused you. Love hurts. real bad sometimes. I know, I am going through a seperation right now as well. I don't know the best advice to give you, just try to be strong, that's what I am telling myself as well. -Jen