broken_dreams Posted November 6, 2011 Share Posted November 6, 2011 warning going to be a rant/long read .. if you've read my other post you'll already see where this is going.. same old same old been engaged/dating for 3 years have 3 kids together the oldest is my step son 2 girls are ours. just had a big move to the city in a nice town home finally trying to make it home in fact i'm painting our bathrooms today. so heres how our lifes been going we'll have a great few weeks then randomly the smallest thing will piss one of us off and so the break up fight begins then we blow it up huge then we sex and everythings back to normal.. lately its been lasting longer and longer (staying single on facebook) and i just dont know how much more i can take seems like 9 times out of 10 is my fault or so it seems .. my hubby has been unemployed for almost 2 years and really doesnt seem to care too much about it he always "forgets" to grab resumes on the way out or will do it later. i'm always stuck doing dishes and laundry cuz waiting for him to do things is like waiting for xmas to arrive. i should be enjoying time with my kids as he sleeps up stairs instead i;m sitting here writing this i love him to pieces we kindergarten sweeties and when were good were gold and its great! but when were bad its just real bad it doesn't help that i have anger issues and have got a history of beening abusive to bfs in the past. i've tryed working with a therapist and counsellors but got no where fast with any of them. i'm in such a rut i duno how to get out of it i basically wake up sad cuz i wonder how long the happy will last for the day i'm in the middle of trying to lose weight cuz i have self-esteem issues just feels like everything is falling apart and i cant catch it in time. also note after having 2 pregnancys back to back the youngest is 7 months and i still have no sex drive back! Link to comment
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