im so lonely

[if only]

my ex broke up with me over three months ago we were together for 5 years.

 

I have accepted we are not together and I have got to a point were I can actually say I do not want him back. He is also seeing someone else and I have seen them together, it doesn't hurt me.

 

Problem is, it is coming up to my birthday and throughout my adult life he always organised surprises for me and I always got very excited!!! I have never felt like this. im dreading the day, even though my friends have been brilliant and organised a big night out it just isn't the same.

 

The other thing that is bringing me down is I have loads of holiday left at work but I just don't want to take it, we always spent our hol together and would go away. None of my friends can afford a holiday so if I take time off I will just be at home which is not appealing!!!

 

Its not him I miss it is having someone to share things with and to spend time with. As much as my friends are there for me they have lives and cant just drop things for me like he used to.

 

Oh and im going away for a long weekend with some of our friends, he was suppose to come with me before the break up and everything is still in his name. The friends are all in couples and we always done everything together. Now I have to face it alone or take a friend with me, I'm just not looking forward to spending the weekend with couples as that is what I miss so much.

 

I'm sure I will be fine in the next couple of weeks, this is the last little hurdles that are left that we would usually do together I suppose that is why I feel so bad.

 

Just wish I could do something to make me feel better xxx

[Noggy27]

Hi

 

Yeah i am in the same boat as you at the moment. I lived with my ex so i found that since we split up I have no house, no family, no kids, no gf to talk to me through good and bad experiences.

 

I know how you feel about feeling SO alone! You can be in a room with hundreds of people but still feel alone. I think its the partnership we are missing. That bond.

 

The way I have been dealing with it is by doing things I have always wanted to do but never had the time to because She was an excuse not to do it. Not saying it was her fault. I am just saying I used her as an excuse not to be able to do them. So what does everyone think? Go ahead and DO them! Learn to sing! Travel the world. Meet and talk to strange people in bars. Before you know it, you will have such an active life you wont even remember you are lonely and then before you know it maybe that new special guy will come along. I have found that sitting at home thinking " OH I am so lonely" is just a sign that you haven't learned to love yourself yet and have fun with you! You need to fall in love with yourself again before you can move on if you know what I mean.

[Carthiana]

Hey, today is my birthday, and since we are separated, he does not feel the need to give me a card or anything. And we work together!!

 

So he sends me this simple message "I didn't think getting you a card was appropriate". Ok, he said he wanted to be friends. Pardon me but don't friends send each other cards at the least?

 

Yeah, so un-happy birthday to me /fake cheer

 

No husband to support me, and no friends that remember. I think this will be the last year i celebrate.

[CarterJonas]

First thing first - Happy birthday Carthiana

 

If only - I can totally understand how you feel. I have been separated as well for six months and I sometimes miss the closeness of a relationship. I don't necessarily miss her, but being with someone to share things like holidays..etc.

 

Although I have friends around me I can totally understand the feeling lonely part, it is not the same is it? I also have plenty of holidays left to take and since all of my close friends are in relationships, I am also a bit lost as to what to do!! I don't think I could handle going on a holiday myself

 

Anyway we don't have much choice over the matter and have to make the best of the situation we are currently in, which is only TEMPORARY. Anyway I'm off this friday and monday to make the most of the good weather we are having at the moment.

 

I hope things get better for you as well, as I'm sure they will,so good luck.

[Carthiana]

Thanks Carter! Much Appreciated.

[jones105]

Happy Birthday Carthiana. I went through the same thing back in December - It was hard. CarterJonas is right though. It is only temporary.

 

if only? I TOTALLY agree with Noggy27. I've started making a list myself ranging from the small (owning a set of Le Creust saucepans) to the huge (learning to fly)

[fantasia2004]

happy birthday carth

[saren]

Happy birthday Carthiana!

-s