Now HE has suddenly gone NC on ME!

[butterfly6585]

Has anyone else experienced a sudden, total role reversal where you were the only one who had gone through times of doing NC with your ex yet they just kept right on trying to contact you on a regular basis but now THEY are suddenly ignoring you completely? That's what's happening to me now & I've been having a pretty hard time coping with it. Since he's never ignored me like this since we broke up, I have a feeling that it's because he's found someone else that he really likes now.

 

He's dated (exclusively) 2 different girls since we split up but I guess they were both rebounds as one of them he was only official with for 2 weeks & the other one only 1 week before they split up. Both times while he was seeing those girls, he was still trying to contact me on an almost daily basis. Now...he's not contacting me at all..& he's been totally ignoring my efforts to contact him. Last time I heard from him was March 26th when he sent me two texts that day (hi & what are you up to) & I haven't heard a word from him since then. Didn't really think too much of it at first until I tried contacting him after close to a week of NC & he totally ignored me.

 

Anyone else going through something similar??

[22n32]

My ex did this. But she did it for 2 reasons. One so it would be easier for me to het over her..

 

And second the calls Totaly stoped when she found someone else to date..

 

Who cares take this time and use it to get over ur ex and fond someone better. I still love my ex but I'm slowly dating..

[kingofatlantis]

Mine went NC right from day 1 because she was seeing another guy. I wouldn't think about it too much just leave it, if he isn't contacting you it could very well be that he's seeing someone I personally wouldn't be talking to an ex if i was in a new relationship. Just stop contacting him and do your thing he shouldn't be getting the best of both worlds.

 

Also judging from your post it seems like you went NC for the wrong reasons.

[twitchyfingers]

I'm a bit confused: you say you were in NC, but also that you'd been making efforts to contact him (which he is now ignoring). So, I guess you weren't in NC?

 

In any event, sounds like a good time to TRULY go NC.

[Mauxly]

Eer...yeah, that's not NC, that's just messing with each other. Time to go NC for real and start the healing process.

[butterfly6585]

agresel,

Some of the things you said were accurate. However, as far as the see if we can meet new people thing, I haven't so much as even gone on a date with somone else since the ex & I split up. He's the only one of us that's been dating (& I'm sure sleeping with other people). Hadn't wanted to cuz I still love him alot. Clearly though,he doesn't love me in that same way or else we'd be back together right now.

 

twitchy,

Sorry, I guess I should have been a little clearer in my post about the whole NC thing. Since my ex & I first broke up several months ago, I've gone NC on him several times now. Each time I've gone NC, I've had every intent to STAY NC unless & until he contacts me & actually seems truly SINCERE about wanting us to reconcile. However, up until just a week ago, he kept contacting me saying stuff like i love you, i miss you, etc. & I made the mistake of falling for these "crumbs" & ended up repeatedly giving in & talking to him again. About a week ago, I decided to yet again go NC & then I messed up when I started feeling panicky because I was really surprised when I still hadn't heard back from him after a week (since the very longest he's ever gone without trying to contact me normally is just three days).

 

Thanks for your input everyone.

[butterfly6585]

agresel,

Yes, it doesn't make sense that this has been the longest period of NC on his part & that he kept contacting me even when he was dating othe girls. That was actually the 2nd time that he's asked me to go look at engagement rings. The first time was about four months after our break up & I agreed to it. Obviously, he never ended up proposing to me (far, far from it) & so when he invited me to go do this a 2nd time I refused to do so because based on past experience I knew he wasn't really serious about it. Not to mention, why in the world would he think for even a second that I'd want to go look at engagement rings with him right after he just gone dating & screwing some other girl?

 

I know that I need to just finally accept that it's over. It's just so hard though because I love him so much that I wanted to marry him & spend the rest of my life with him. I honestly have tried to move on (although I guess I didn't try hard enough obviously) but he's made it so freaking hard because it's like he has a freaking radar that lets him know when I'm finally start to heal & move on & then he panicks about losing me but then the 2nd I agree to try & work things out with him (when he's aske me to do that), he back peddles & changes his mind. Now I'm suddenly not hearing him from him at all which I guess in a way is good that at least he's not giving me mixed messages anymore but it just breaks my heart to think that maybe the reason he's no longer contacing me & is ignoring ME now is because maybe he thinks he's found someone really special & doesn't want to (potentially) screw things up with her by talking to me.

[merce79]

not to come off rude but did you think he would wait forever? They do move on eventually.

[PrettyGood]

Well maybe he's just bored of that NC thing. So he lost his will to do something else. If he didn't do anything until you were on NC, then maybe he found another one. I don't think it's some kind of revenge for you, because guys are smart, but not too smart to use such tactics as women do.