It's been 5 years, why can't I get over my ex?? Please help

[exotic]

I was with this wonderful man for 2 years, I felt like we broke up for a stupid reasons. He tried so hard to get back with me, but I gave him the cold shoulder out of pride. I end up going out with a different person months down the line. I fee inlove with this guy, this things slowly started to change, I feel out of love with him. I still love him, but it's not the same. Through all the years I was with my current bf, I couldn't somehow stop thinking of my ex. I told my bf after the 1 year of the relationship, but he said I would get over my ex. Recently my bf proposed to me. I was surprised since we were having a lot of problems. I said yes, in hopes we can resolve and work things out. After being engaged for 1 month, we decided it wouldn't work. We argued more than ever. It was the worst feeling. After being together for almost 5 years, we decided to just be friends. Now, instead of me thinking and missing my recent ex, I'm still reminscing about my past ex (almost 6 years now). I need help...I was thinking of calling just to say, "Hi". Just so I can get it out of my system. I guess I just need a closure.

[Amy_32588]

I say, go for it. You only live once and if you ignore your feelings you'll always be thinking about what could have happened.

[lupe]

well i am going through the same sitution but i am the guy and she broke up with me. right now i am trying my hardest to get back with her, and i am doing every single romantic thing in the book but she is just blowing me off or giving me the cold sholder, than she turns around to talk to some other guy and leaves me in the dark. But she knows that i still love her,and i am trying so hard. so i guess in your sitution i would do it, if you read this could you give me addvice if you can.

[alwaysinmess]

Well exotic, if i were u i would call him because in fact everything who would result after this call would be better than staying with this feeling coz it won't go away.. so better to know what would happen call him , who knows u might discover after calling him that it was just a fantasy and u just forgot about him .. and maybe the reverse will happen .. anyway it is better to call him than to feel this pain of missing him..if it is so hard as u say.. good luck

[MrDraw]

Hi exotic,

 

Forgetting somebody you've loved, isn't as easy as you would like it to be.

But you've already experienced that.

 

I broke-up with my ex-GF 2 years ago and I'm still thinking of her sometimes. No thoughts of getting her back or wanting her, but just thinking about what we had and what went wrong (what I did wrong).

I loved her very much, but things just didn't wotk between us, as they would never going to work eventually.

I'm still sad at times that I'm still single and she has a BF with whom she's living together now. But I wish her all the best and know that in time I too will find somebody (well I hope so).

 

I've realized that time will make things easier, and that eventually I will think less and less of her. But I will never forget!!

We still have some sort of way of keeping in touch every once in a while via e-mail. Just keeping eachother "up to speed", that's about it.

 

Listen to your heart and act accordingly, if you want to get in touch with him, just do that. Via e-mail is the easiest way (i think) it creates some sort of distance of some sort.

Make no big deal out if it at first, just write about little things in life.

Eventually you will notice (find out) how he is and what goes on in his life.

From that point on you can get a littlebit closer to him if he's up for that.

Start with "friendship" and see what follows.

 

I hope you will find your "peace of mind"!!

From my part I wish you all the best!!

 

Greetz,

MrDraw

[TrueHeart]

Well, I can sympathize. I never truly got over my XXBF, even after and during me dating my XBF for 2 years... Its more or less the closure you need, even saying hi-- Just take into consideration though (and expect) that he has moved on, and may or may not accept your gesture of friendship. If calling to say hi after all these years, it might be a welcome surprise.. Try it... worse possible scenerio: atleast if it doesn't work, you will have the closure you need...

[stolenshadow]

You are not alone, I've also missed my ex for years and years (3 in my case) and even if other people came into my life I never got him out of my head(or heart).

Just call if you are ready to hear that he's married, in love and maybe even with a kid, I'm not saying it's going to be that way just that, in case it is, you know you'll be able to deal with it.

Of course, if you don't call, you'll be standing in that same place for a long time, wondering about him.

Good Luck.

[exotic]

I say, go for it. You only live once and if you ignore your feelings you'll always be thinking about what could have happened.

 

 

Thank you so much for replying, I tried calling on his birthday last month, I left a message with one of his employees with my cell number, but no return call. I do know that he has a gf, but not serious from what his dad tells me. I'm very close with his father up to now. Regardless with what I do, I can't get him out of my head.....