She has a new boyfriend

[kholdstare]

Well, I finally got my reason for the break up. One of her friends told me she was seeing this guy that was heavily in the picture before we split. So I called her and asked what was up, probably a mistake, but who knows. She said it was true that they are together, but he wasnt the reason for the breakup. SO right now I feel terrible, dont know what to do, how to feel, anything. Any help you guys have would be greatly appreciated.

[hurtbylove]

It's best you try to move on with your life.

 

Letting go is hard but we all have to go through it sometime.

 

It does suck she is already with someone else, but you can't do anything about it. Trying to force things on her will just prolong your pain.

[fantasia2004]

Remember she gave up on you by seeing someone else, so don't feel so bad . It hurts now but it does get easier and with time someone new is in the picture.

 

Cheer up it gets worse before it gets better.

 

I can relate to the same situation as you did

[girlygirl227]

Hey, I read some of your past emails and I realized that I am in a very similar situation. I dated a guy for about a year and then broke things off with him. He felt it was completely out of the blue, though we had talked about some major differences we had before the actual "break-up" talk. I debated breaking it off for about a month, b/c I truly love(d) him, and didn't want to break up/get back together/break up/etc...

 

Once I finally did it, shortly after he tried to contact me via phone, email, other people, etc. I refused to even talk to him, b/c I felt it would just make things harder for both of us. A couple of weeks after the break-up, I started dating someone else. He found out and flipped out, thinking that the new guy was the cause, when in actually I didn't even know the guy when I broke up with him. Anyway, the relationship didn't last (the guy dumped me), but my ex is STILL trying to contact me. My actions, like your ex's, may be perceived as "hostile," but in all honestly it's a defense mechanism - I don't want to be hurt again, or more importantly, I don't want to hurt him again. I'm afraid of giving him false hope, and that's worse than being perceived as hostile. While I'm not your ex, it seems I'm in the same boat as her, so I thought I'd let you know what maybe running through her mind. (Maybe she had issues with just living together and not being married, I don't know. The living together thing seems to ALWAYS be a bad idea.)

 

The bottom line is, it sounds like you've let her know in no uncertain terms that you want to try again. As hard as it may be, try to go on with your life as if she were out of the picture. She knows your heart and that you'd be willing to try things again with you, and she'll find you if she ever changes her mind. But be fair to yourself and go on with your life. I bet there's someone else out there who is even better than her, and who won't disappear on you.

 

Good luck with everything. I'm sorry you're hurting and I feel certain that she's sorry you're hurting too. Don't make her keep hurting you over and over again.

[Technical Support]

For me there was nothing more gut wrenching than to find out for sure that my ex ended up getting together with the very guy I was worried about. I had questioned her about him on the day we broke up and she told me that he was like a little brother to her...looking back on it I guess she felt she had to lie for what ever reason she came up with.

 

If you know you treated her great and did everything you could to make her and yourself happy in your relationship then you cant let it get you down. In my case, I feel that my girlfriend was bored with living a normal life or somewhat stable...she felt that she didnt really know if I was the one unless she dated others to compare me to...whatever. She has since got him a job at her workplace as if thats gona turn out well.

 

Right now im still at the point that I want things to go badly for her...and him. A nasty break up would make me happy right now...but I guess what would make me feel even better is to not care anymore about what happens in her life...

 

After four months in our breakup I must say that things are getting better...I never forget that things can take a turn and setbacks are to be expected...but if she has moved on then so must you...and thats what you will do...just give it time...

 

(sorry for the rant)