J1535 Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 We broke up in January after a 1.5 year relationship. tried our best to go NC. after a month we started hanging out again and spending a lot of time together. The past couple weeks have been amazing! The first week we started hanging out again she asked me to hang out almost every day, but ever since then it's been less and less. and now I notice she is talking to me less every day. It's been almost two hours since her last text and she usually always texts me and calls me when she gets out of class, which was an hour ago. I'm just confused of what I should do. It seems clear that she isn't too interested in our relationship but i know she is a little. I was going to ask her back out on sunday, we were planning on going on a date. I think we are supposed to talk about if the date is still on tomorrow. She coming over to hang out tomorrow before she goes to work. She's going away to college in august so part of me wants to give up on this now and save myself the trouble of losing her all over again later. But the other part can't pass up this opportunity. Right now I am just trying to give her as much space as possible, no texting or calling unless she does it first. So what do you think, does this seem to be going anywhere? Link to comment
Lastchallenge Posted March 12, 2010 Share Posted March 12, 2010 I hate to say it but move on... Once it's broken quite frankly it's a mess after that... Once you truly accept this and let go you will reliaze how exciting life really is without the person... I saw mine yesterday and realized that this is all a mess that's not worth fixing... Let some other sucker deal with the drama and pay... There's alot of good looking women out there and once you realize that you'll see it's most incredible... Link to comment
minou Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Maybe it's time you start calling her too. You may be giving her the wrong signal if you continue only waiting for her to call. However, give it space. Why does she have to call you several times a day. Sounds like you're seeing plenty of each other. If the last couple of weeks have been amazing, what's the problem? Link to comment
Diagonal Posted March 13, 2010 Share Posted March 13, 2010 Agree with Minou, maybe she's feeling a bit smoothered by all the contact you've had recently. remember you only broke up in Jan, which isn't that long ago! Give her the space she needs, don't try to rush things and don't let her do all the running. If you do all of the above, then I'm sure you'll see soon enough what her intentions are. From you post it seems like things have been going well and ok you might be having a little lull, but you can't expect progress all the time, these things take time! More patience and positivity on the menu I think. Link to comment
J1535 Posted March 19, 2010 Author Share Posted March 19, 2010 I asked her out sunday, she said yes, changed her mind a few hours later saying she wasn't sure if she wanted that yet. Ugh, so now she is telling me she wants to stop hanging out so much because it feels like we are dating and she doesn't want that. So she says we should stop the kissing, hand holding.. things like that. She still wants to hang out saturday but not on sunday now. i really don't get her. I don't understand how she can seem so happy when she is with me but still not want to be with me. We hung out today and had a great time as usual. I can't imagine anything i'd rather do on sunday than hang out with her and she said she has no idea what she wants to do instead. So it seems like anything is better than hanging out with me? Or am I just looking in to that too much? Basically I still love her but I just don't know what to do with this girl anymore ](*,) Link to comment
J1535 Posted March 19, 2010 Author Share Posted March 19, 2010 is it time to give on up this girl or what? Link to comment
JBaker Posted March 19, 2010 Share Posted March 19, 2010 Patience is key. If you want her back you will have to be patient. You may have to force yourself to be content with just casually dating her for the next several months. If you cannot handle that then you should stop things now before you allow yourself to get hurt further. Reconciliation is a long and difficult process, as you are finding out. She is not telling you that she is not interested in you. She is only saying that she needs more time and space to herself at the present moment. She isn't saying she does not like being around you (as you have interpreted), she is just saying that she is not ready to be in an exclusive relationship right now for whatever reason. Whatever you do, do not mope around and let her know that the slow process is hurting you. Just go with the flow. Link to comment
J1535 Posted March 20, 2010 Author Share Posted March 20, 2010 Thanks for your insight JBaker. I guess you are right, she did not say that she is not interested in me or that she does not like being around me. I kind of assumed those things by what she was telling me. We are still hanging out tomorrow so i guess i'll try to keep my hands to myself and just hang out as friends. Hopefully she'll come around, I am giving her as much space as she needs Link to comment
J1535 Posted March 20, 2010 Author Share Posted March 20, 2010 well she just told me that she just wants to be friends now. and she just needs time to figure out what she wants. still hanging out tomorrow, should be fun. ](*,) Link to comment
Diagonal Posted March 20, 2010 Share Posted March 20, 2010 Don't see it as a negative. She want's to see you still and needs some time and space to figure things out. The fact she is considering things is a positive, really it is. Have fun and continue to take things slow and you're giving yourself the best possible chance of something happening Link to comment
J1535 Posted March 20, 2010 Author Share Posted March 20, 2010 Well she just left for work. We had a pretty good day, just sat around watching tv hanging out. We are now hanging out tomorrow. She said she couldn't find anything else to do so she wants to. I want to think there is still a chance but she mentioned that she still just wants to be friends while she was over so I'm not sure. Link to comment
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